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matt_zimmerThe Little Mermaid: Ariel's Beginning
Saying the latest (and last) Disney cheapquel is a disappointment will probably sound funny to those who consider ALL of these unnecessary follow-ups to the original Disney classics horrible but it really is. To be completely fair, I actually enjoyed parts of The Little Mermaid II: Return to the Sea and The Little Mermaid TAS so it WAS a bit of a let-down that this "prequel" fell so short.
I think the movie has two major flaws. The first is a big one and is REALLY hard to get around: prequels are so hard to make successfully because you not only have to create an original story but you have to make it so that what came before synchs up with the original work. This is hard to do because usually in a story characters start out rigidly behaving in one way and loosening up or showing their true colors as they go along. Both Sebastian and Triton in the original film were kind of hard-nosed so in order to make them seem like they're taking a journey they had to make them even jerkier than they were at the beginning of the original film. The movie was clever in making Sebastian a bigger jerk here. Instead of it being that he WAS as huge of a meanie as he was portrayed here, it was a beard to misdirect Triton from learning that he was the ringleader of the musician outlaws. TRITON on the other hand...
Look, Triton was hardly warm and cuddly in the original movie. But it's STILL hard to imagine him being the fascist dictator he was here. There was NO hint of that aspect to his personality in the original and it's just not something I'm willing to buy. Part of Triton's appeal in the first film is that despite the fact that he's kind of a buttwipe you can tell he REALLY cares for his daughters and wants what's best for them but is REALLY lousy at expressing that. That's something a LOT of parents can relate to and is a big part of the reason the first movie had such a universal appeal.
By making things so much worse in Atlantica here the prequel ALSO manages to bungle one of the central themes of the original. I never quite understood WHY Ariel was so desperate to be up on land; I tended to agree with Sebastian that things were MUCH more fun and colorful Under the Sea. I always assumed she was like that because she was kind of a flake and fell in love with the first boy she saw. But now, instead of people just assuming that Ariel wanted to get away because she was a free spirit, it MIGHT make some people think that part of the reason she wanted to leave in the first movie is to get away from an abusive childhood. NOT cool and it's something I WOULD consider if I considered the movie canon like I do the first sequel and the animated series. But this movie has people behaving SO out of character here I sometimes wonder if the writers even SAW the original film. Not to mention a lot of it contradicts The Animated Series (including Ariel's introduction to Flounder which was MUCH cuter there).
The second major problem with the movie is just something that we've HAD to basically accept about all animated films since Aladdin: pop culture jokes and rude slapstick. It was hard enough to deal with that garbage infecting both The Lion King and The Hunchback of Notre Dame (which were both flawless movies otherwise) but an animated film CAN'T be made nowadays without appealing to the baser instincts of stupid children. The thing that infuriates me about it here is that The Little Mermaid franchise was one of the few recent Disney frachises that DIDN'T feel the need to appeal to idiots and here the over-the-top villain (played by Sally Field) feels like she has no business being in this universe.
By the way, Flounder is not brave. He has to be coaxed into doing ANYTHING even remotely scary. By making him the "cool kid" in the movie NO explanation is given for his bizarre personality transplant. You can change a character's personality to grow in a sequel. But NOT in a prequel. The prequel has to have the characters match up to where they were at the beginning of the original and again, is one of the biggest reasons they are hard to pull off successfully.
The first half of the movie was actually REALLY bad with a lot of trite Disney cliches and bad dialogue. It gets better as it goes along (the best scene is the reveal of Sebastian at the club singing Harry Belafonte) and the second half is okay. I thought it ended pretty well too until they got to the coda with the villain Marina and her helper Benjamin in prison. I guess the filmmakers felt the need to explain why NEITHER was in the original, The Animated Series, or the sequel but it left a really bad taste in my mouth that Benjamin wound up in jail considering he tried to STOP Marina in the first place and wasn't a villain at all. Again, this scene simply seemed to make Triton look like an impossible jerk. I suppose it could be argued that Ben was only visiting Marina, but when you have to start making up justifications for bad writing the easiest explanation is usually that the writing IS actually bad.
So all in all, the movie is a disappointment. The animation is nice and pretty but the movie messes up established characters and premises too much to be completely enjoyable. I'm glad they got both Jodi Benson and Samuel E. Wright to both return as Ariel and Sebastian but the movie felt too far removed from the original for me to actually think it was good. **1/2.
Deleted Scenes:
Sebastian Waking the Girls: Cute scene but unnecessary. **.
Ariel Follows Flounder: It's surprising that a scene they cut actually has funnier jokes than the majority of the movie. ***1/2.
The X-Files Season Three
The X-Files third season is probably it's best. Not because it's stand-alone or mythology episodes are that great, but because it has three classic episodes written by the talented and hilarious Darin Morgan. So basically an otherwise so-so season's grade is upped to the Nth degree.
The mythology starts to get overwrought with the Black Oil this season which is portrayed VERY inconsistantly as the series went on. This became a problem as the series constantly added new twists while refusing to answer questions. Even the series finale six years later didn't answer all that much. Chris Carter was obviously making it up as he went along and it shows.
Best episodes of the season are the three Darin Morgan written Classics: the touching Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose, the wry War of the Coprophages, and the completely off the wall Jose Chung's "From Outer Space". Also great were the two part season premiere (The Blessing Way/ Paper Clip) which pays off last season's cliffhanger in a relatively satisfactory way, the FIRST part of the Black Oil Saga (Piper Maru) and the cool but at times infuriating season finale (Talitha Cumi).
Worst episodes of the year are the upsetting The Walk, and the Killer Cat fest Teso Dos Bichos which came THIS close to being a great episode and had a great concept which was totally botched. Season overall: ****1/2.
The Blessing Way: Excellent premiere with a killer cliffhanger. I love the expanded role William B. Davis has received. This episode is also notable for the debuts of both the Consortium and The Well-Manicured Man. It was also awesome to see Deep Throat (Jerry Hardin) in a brief cameo. ****1/2.
Paper Clip: Rewatching this made me realize that even if Chris Carter DIDN'T have a clue where the mythology was going, it hangs together pretty well here with what came later. It wasn't until they hit the Black Oil that not everything added up. Good episode. ****1/2.
D.P.O.: Giovanni Ribisi gives a REALLY creepy performance as Darin Oswald and it was a blast seeing Jack Black in one of his earlier roles. I also like the way they messed with the Executive Producer credits at the end. ***1/2.
Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose: Another Darin Morgan classic, this is a hilarious episode that unlike any other Morgan episode is also incredibly moving in places. Yes, you have characters like the Stupendous Yappi but watching Peter Boyle (Everybody Loves Raymond) as Clyde Bruckman sadly realize his life is coming to an end and having to spend his entire life dealing with his and other people's mortality is just great and heartfelt. We also get the first hints of Scully's immortality which would be paid off in a later season. I can't say enough good things about the episode. One of the very best of the series. *****.
The List: VERY scary and unsettling episode. This one really worked. I also liked seeing Lost's April Grace (Miss Klugh) as Neech's wife. ***1/2.
2Shy: I seriously winced during parts of this episode. It was good but it was almost too gory even for this show. ***.
The Walk: This episode was rather upsetting for me. I don't like seeing little kids get killed and the death count was disturbing. *1/2.
Oubliette: A heartbreaking outing that is made all the more wrenching because the abducted girl is played by a young Jewel Staite (Firefly) and it's TOUGH to watch a young Kaylee getting tortured. Never-the-less the episode is powerful. ***1/2.
Nisei: I loved the forshadowing to Scully's cancer arc especially since I didn't remember it. The Alien Autopsy gags at the expense of Fox were great too. ****.
731: Mulder's Cat and Mouse and eventual smackdown of the "Red Haired Man" made the episode good but I think the thing I liked best about this is the fact that Scully finally got "proof" that aliens don't exist and frankly some serious proof that what the government does COULD be worse because it sets Mulder and Scully's relationship as believer/ skeptic back to it's essentials. Really, there's no way you'd buy Scully still having this hard a time believing in stuff without a good reason and this episode has given us a great one. ****.
Revelations: I really liked this episode especially Kenneth Welsh (Windom Earle from Twin Peaks) as the Millennium Man. Unfortunately Mulder is so obnoxious towards Scully this episode that that knocks the grade down quite a bit. ***1/2.
War of the Coprophages: This tale of alien robot cockroaches is the weak link of the six X-Files/ Millennium episodes written by Darin Morgan and I say that somewhat ironically since the episode itself is really, REALLY good. It's just that each of Morgan's other outings were five star quality while this is only four and a half stars. I love Dr. Bambi Barenbaum and the episode had a lot of great lines. I especially liked the touch of it seeming like a cockroach is climbing over your TV screen. I had seen the episode before but I think the first time I saw that I jumped. I also liked seeing the dog Clyde Bruckman gave Scully make a reappearance. Look for Reaper's Tyler "Sock" Labine in a small role as a stoner (he also pops up in Quagmire as does that same dog). ****1/2.
Syzygy: The X-Files does the wacky. All of this wild stuff was happening during this episode and you didn't understand exactly what was going on until practically the ending. I ESPECIALLY loved Mulder and Scully's bizarre behavior and hostility towards each other since it was played for laughs. ***1/2.
Grotesque: Spooky episode that takes on the true nature of evil. Kurtwood Smith (The Zeta Project's Agent Bennett) does a good guest turn as an unflappable FBI agent who finally flaps. Big time. ***.
Piper Maru: Ugh, the Black Oil. It makes no sense and won't go away. I hate it. But I love this episode anyways. LOTS of great twists and turns that are rewarding for the "right now" fans but painful for the larger mythology. Too much coolness, not enough foresight. Great cliffhanger too. ****1/2.
Apocrypha: Decent but still not in love with the Black Oil. I think the episode's saving grace is that it started the fun of Krycek being practically unkillable and ALWAYS returning no matter how dire his fate. Of course that gag was ruined in season seven when he was actually killed off but it was fun while it lasted. ***1/2.
Pusher: I like this one a lot simply because Pusher (Robert Wisden) is so charming and iredeemably evil. ***1/2.
Teso Dos Bichos: SUPER boring episode until the awesome reveal at the end of the killer cats. I know revealing it earlier would have ruined some of the surprise twist but I would have enjoyed this episode a LOT more had I known the culprits were killer cats from the start and actually SEEN more of them. It's like the producers went SO overboard in trying to be scary (unsuccessfuly I might add) that they completely missed the golden opportunity for some hilarious camp value. **1/2.
Hell Money: The Chinese version of The Lottery. I tend to think this episode is better than it actually is due to seeing earlier roles for B.D. Wong (Law & Order: SVU), Lucy Liu (Ally McBeal, Futurama) and the ultra-cool James Hong as the Hard-Faced Man. So it goes down easier than it probably should. ***.
Jose Chung's "From Outer Space": Bleeping brilliant. This episode has everything: comedy, an alien smoking a cigarette, men in black, lava-men, sweet potato pie, Alex Trebek. Jesse Ventura gives a hilarious performance as the first Man in Black but really, the episode is a tour de force for Charles Nelson Reilly as Jose Chung. Yes, THAT Charles Nelson Reilly. Also, look for a cameo from The Stupendous Yappi. This classic has genius up the blankety blank and is the best episode of the season and like Darin Morgan's OTHER classic of the year (Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose) one of the very best episodes of the entire series. *****.
Avatar: I like this for the insight it gives to Skinner. I also always appreciate seeing the super hot Jennifer Hetrick (Star Trek) here playing Skinner's wife Sharon. ****.
Quadmire: Heh, heh. Alllllriiiiiiight. (Sorry couldn't resist). I love that this episode went there. Oh, yes. The monster actually ATE Scully's dog (who we learned she named Queequeg). I also loved the considerable Mulder/ Scully sparkage as they were trapped on that rock surrounded by two feet of water. A good 'un. ****.
Wetwired: GREAT episode dealing with the conspiracy. I loved learning Mulder was color-blind and that's why he was immune to the broadcasts. The latst shot of X and the Cigarette Smoking Man was great too. ****.
Talitha Cumi: MUCH better than I remembered it. I love Roy Thinnes as the series' Christ-like figure Jeremiah Smith. It was also great to see Jerry Hardin as Deep Throat again and seeing X FINALLY turn on Mulder. I think my biggest beef back in the day was that the episode continuously promises answers and then leaves us on a cliffhanger without delivering any in an infuriating manner. But if you simply enjoy it for the character stuff it's really actually pretty good. I think last year's Anasazi left us with particularly high expectations for season finales but we should have learned by now that Chris Carter's hit/ miss ratio is spotty at best. I still enjoyed it. ****1/2.
Deleted Scene: The Blessing Way: VERY long scene that could NOT have fit into the otherwise packed episode. The stuff with Melissa wasn't that great but I think the scene where Scully confesses to her mother that she (Scully) has been acting like Mulder is something I'm kind of sad the episode had to lose. ***1/2.
Deleted Scene: Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose: It's probably just because I've gone into serious Peter Boyle withdrawal since his death but I was SO hoping the deleted scene featured Clyde himself. It was still pretty funny but I wish there had been an extra scene of Bruckman somewhere in the vault. ***1/2.
Deleted Sequence: The List: An earlier introduction to Neech's lawyer and his walk down death row. Cool finds. ***.
Deleted Scene: Revelations: This scene with Kevin's father quoting from Revelations would have been too confusing to put in the episode. It was only because I read what the DVD menu said about his line being from the book of Revelations that I understood it. I still didn't get why Scully didn't tell Mulder what it meant. Confusing. **1/2.
Deleted Scenes: Avatar: The scene between Skinner and Cancer Man rocked so hard I almost consider it a crime that they didn't leave it in. The scene with Skinner and the doctor was SO obviously not needed though. We've watched enough medical shows on TV to know how comas work. ****.
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Date: 2008-09-09 10:19 pm (UTC)I'm sorry, but that just seems goofy and very 80s.
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Date: 2008-09-09 11:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-10 03:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-10 02:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-11 07:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-11 11:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-10 02:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-10 03:18 am (UTC)Ariel's curiosity is what gets the best of her in the first movie. It's not that Atlantica is harsh, she does feel that her father is holding her back a little, but that's typical teenage rebellion stuff. She did have a "love at first sight" moment, but the more she knows she can't do something, the more she wants to do it.
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Date: 2008-09-10 02:46 pm (UTC)