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matt_zimmerAlso reviews for the latest episodes of Batman Unlimited, DC Comics' Vixen, Marvel's Avengers Assemble, Girl Meets, World, Transformers: Robots In Disguise, Power Rangers Dino Charge, and the webisodes "Dark Matters" from the new series Heroes Reborn.
Upcoming reviews include Avengers: Age Of Ultron (Blu-Ray), Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Season 2, Marvel's Agent Carter: Season 1, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Blu-Ray), X-Men: Days Of Future Past: The Rogue Cut, Big Hero 6 (Blu-Ray), Once Upon A Time: Season 4, The Walt Disney Studios Short Films Collection, Tangled, Phineas And Ferb: Star Wars, Star Wars Rebels: Season 1, Lego Star Wars: The New Yoda Chronicles, Muppets Most Wanted: Extended Edition, Lego DC Comics Super Heroes: Justice League: Attack Of The Legion Of Doom, Batman Unlimited: Monster Mayhem, Teen Titans Go!: House Pests, Arrow: Season 3, The Flash: Season 1, Gotham: Season 1, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey: Extended Edition, The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug: Extended Edition, Looney Tunes: Rabbits Run, Airplane! / Airplane II: The Sequel: Double Feature, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 2, Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, Power Rangers Turbo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Turbo: Volume 2, Power Rangers In Space Volume 1, Power Rangers In Space: Volume 2, Power Rangers Samurai: The Complete Season, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Showdown In Dimension X, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Retreat!, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Return To NYC!, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014), Mr. Peabody & Sherman, Haven: Season 5 - Vol. 1, Sleepy Hollow: Season 2, Doctor Who: Dark Water: Death In Heaven, Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Season 2, and The Jurassic Park Trilogy.
Batman Unlimited "Armored Truck Heist"
A little bland, especially since it might be the last one. **1/2.
DC Comics' Vixen "Episode 4"
I would have liked to have seen Felicity Smoak animated. That is all. ****.
Marvel's Avengers Assemble "New Frontier"
Pretty good. Anytime I get to see Hawkeye humiliated is a good day. We'll see next week how the conclusion is. ***.
Girl Meet World "Girl Meets I Am Farkle"
Normally I'd compliment this show on being the first Disney Channel show for tackling autism and Asperger's, but by saying Farkle DOESN'T have it (when he clearly does) is a really bad idea for a "Happy ending". Because it implies there is something wrong with it. I appreciate the show having Smackle as an audience surrogate, but by saying Farkle DOESN'T have it, they're saying there's something wrong with people who do.
And Maya and Riley firmly screaming he doesn't have it made me cringe because it was again another way to say that Asperger's is a bad thing. It's not. It's not a good thing or a bad thing. It's just a thing. And I'd feel a lot better if Maya and Riley hadn't just acted so clearly judgmental about it.
Good seeing Finkus and Monster again though. **1/2.
Transformers: Robots In Disguise "Battleground, Part 2"
Megatron NAMED himself after Megatronus? Genius! It not only keeps the integrity of Megatron's reformation, but it is implies the new guy is even worse! Brilliant!
"Rev up and roll out" is not any better than anything else Bumblebee said this season. Good to know that lame joke will be retired now though.
And Optimus is gonna stick around? Sweet! Season two should be much better than season one just based on that.
Good finale. ****.
Power Rangers: Dino Charge "Break Out"
Funny story: for the first five minutes I was watching this, I was pretty sure I was watching a rerun. That's how formula these things are.
The Gold Ranger was not set-up properly at all. I get that's how Power Rangers rolls, but that doesn't mean I won't call them on that.
Bad. *.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 1: Where Are The Heroes?"
These webisodes help us play catch-up from the series finale to the sequel. That girl's brother being impressed was so awesome because it totally could have gone the other way. ****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 2: Phoebe"
I couldn't tell what was going on in the second half of this but that ending was cool. ***1/2.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 3: Registered"
Oh, I get it. This is gonna be X-Men. The webisodes have saltier language than either the TV series or previous webisodes did. It's a bit jarring. ***1/2.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 4: June 13th"
Terrorist leader Mohinder Suresh. That's a little too cute by half. Something else is going on. Mohinder wouldn't be the first EVO framed for something he didn't do. *****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 5: Renautas"
Mohinder as fall guy makes sense. He's always been a total sap. I think holding a lighter up to a guy's ear is the same as sticking your finger in their back. And surprisingly, just as effective. *****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 6: Where The Truth Lies"
Okay, just based on the web series and the behind the scenes promos, I'm going to predict something: the new season of Heroes is gonna be awesome. May if there is another season after that it will start sucking again, but this update is exactly what the franchise needed. I am officially excited in a way I have never been before.
Micah? Makes perfect sense and I should have suspected him from the start. I love that it looks like the story of the webisode series will actually continue in the series itself. We may actually get resolution for Quentin and Phoebe in a way we never did for Caitlin. I am impressed and can't wait for the series. *****.
The Wonder Years: Season Three
I'm very surprised. This season was a LOT better than I remembered it. I remember loving "The Goodbye" but I never was wowed by any season after season two back when it aired. This is actually still quite good. Whether the rest of the series is better than I remembered is an open question for seasons four through six, but we'll see soon enough.
The best episodes are the three Mr. Collins ones (Math Class / Math Class Squared / The Goodbye). "The Goodbye" is actually my pick for best episode of the series. "Mom Wars" is also fantastic. The worst episodes were one of the few total misfires on the show (The Pimple) and the credibility straining "The Unnatural". "The Glee Club" is also a low point, mainly due to the fact that the scenario it posits is TOO perfect, therefore also completely unrealistic. Season Overall: ****.
Summer Song:
Kevin's summer romance was unbearably sweet and the fact that that was the only letter Teri wrote him broke my heart. But I have to state that Karen is the most obnoxious person on the face of the Earth. There is a point where being rebellious just turns into being mean and rude. For someone who claims to be a flower child, Karen doesn't seem very mellow to me. ****.
Math Class:
Steven Gilborn was such an amazingly gifted actor. He gave so much using so little. Do you know what I love about Kevin? How hard he tries. That makes me root for him. He possesses enough shame to realize him leaning over was a low point in his education. That's how you can tells Collins is an amazing teacher. He makes Kevin want to work harder. ****1/2.
Wayne On Wheels:
The worst thing about Wayne's maliciousness is that it is unwarranted. It is unnecessary. It is overkill. He gains nothing from it, and always winds up the worse for it. The look Dan Lauria gives as he picks the cornstalk off the wheel of the car was as priceless as any Robert Picardo ever gave as Coach Cutlip. But man, Wayne is beyond cruel for the sake of being cruel. I mean seriously, I would have never even THOUGHT of trying to humiliate my sister in front of her boyfriend as a kid. I always thought that stuff was off-limits between siblings. At least between siblings where both of them are older than 8 years of age. As interesting as Wayne's "Are you okay?" was in humanizing the kid (first time we're ever seen him be serious or look out for his brother) just the fact that the Narrator actually states that that was the first time his brother ever said that speaks volumes. That's something EVERYBODY says to a family member after a close call, and the fact that this was SUCH a huge moment that Kevin actually realized the historic nature of it shows that Wayne is pretty much a terrible person. Even terrible people can get spooked once in a while and let down their defenses for five seconds. That doesn't make them less terrible. By the way? LOVE the extended theme song. Joe Cocker ruled. ****.
Mom Wars:
Norma's behavior during this was quite shrewd, calculating, and cunning. I never realized how secretly on-the-ball she was, but she is. The store announcer saying over the intercom that Kevin Arnold has a large space in his crotch is a classic Wonder Years joke. It is literally the first show that would ever come up with a joke like that. The kid who played Doug Porter played young Ben Hanscomb in Stephen King's IT. Dan Lauria had some great reaction shots in this episode too. My favorite moment was him giving Kevin permission to play football, Norma overriding him, and him telling Kevin to listen to his mother. I love that moment because it shows that Norma IS an equal parent, and despite Jack being so conservative and sexist, still treats his wife with deference on certain matters. It didn't matter enough for him to get into a big fight about it, so he simply trusts her judgment without a second thought. I love that this show does that. It is part of why the parents on The Wonder Years seem so real. Also giving a shout-out to the song at the end. I LOVE "The Circle Game". ****1/2.
On The Spot:
The revelation that Winnie's father moved back in with her family gives the episode resonance it might not otherwise have had without that last sentence from the Narrator. Because we realize that Winnie was absolutely right to treat the play as life and death. I like that Kevin's perspective is that acting in a play sucks (with some nice continuity from last season). That's interesting, because Kevin was actually pretty good at it, and didn't struggle with it the way Winnie did. I love the idea that the kid who doesn't care is blessed with the raw talent, but the kid it REALLY matters to has to work for it a bit. I think Kevin's response to Winnie WAS insensitive, but to be fair, I think everything he said was fine until he told her she was just in the play to get out of 7th period. That was dumb. I also love how Kevin treats Paul's spotlight nonsense as that: nonsense. And for once, he's right. But the messed up thing is that BECAUSE Paul took it so seriously, he got "backstage fright" (heh), and forced Kevin to take charge and basically save the entire play when that was the last thing Kevin was expecting to happen. I think he knew he could handle it, but a guy could use a little warning. Karen uses the word "bourgeois" a lot but I'd be surprised if she actually knew what it meant. You can teach a parrot to squawk "Bourgeois! Bourgeois!" all you want, but in the end, it's still a parrot, and not a liberal. ***1/2.
Odd Man Out:
"The McCovey is off the table!" Kevin is the bad guy in this episode. There is no part of his behavior to his friends that isn't deplorable. I love that he and Paul haggle over cards using old man language: "You've been trying to pawn that Shwartz off on me for years!". I really like Doug Porter. Kevin thinks his agreeable nature makes him a doormat and somebody to take advantage of, but in reality, it just makes him a great friend. That's not the message Kevin gets, and I'm not even sure if the episode wants us to find Doug as anything but pathetic, but just the fact that he immediately clicked with Randy shows that this guy is somebody who is going to be very popular someday, and probably with the ladies too. Women (not girls) truly dig courteous men. And Doug is the most polite guy on the planet. Truly nice people, who put other people first, without even thinking twice about it are a rarity, and I don't really think should be looked down upon. Because when they find the right friend, they are going to be amazing. Doug has a bright future ahead of him. He is nowhere near as pathetic as the Narrator thinks he is. And I think the fact that the episode tries to get us to think he is, shows that the episode itself is fundamentally flawed. Kevin didn't screw up because he hurt the feelings of a loser. He screwed up because he blew his chance to have the best friend possible. And if the episode tries to get the moral to read any other way, it is simply wrong. **1/2.
The Family Car:
Some things I like, some things I didn't. Things I liked: Norma. She is the house peacemaker and knows exactly what to say to get Jack to change his mind and get a new car. How great are her reasoning skills? He asks her if she is aware of the amount of money he puts into the car and she starts itemizing it! She was prepared for that argument! That's awesome! I think that's probably why she was so angry at Karen for calling her father a cheapskate. Because, let's face it, that is the first insult Karen has ever leveled at her father that was actually true. And she's said MUCH worse stuff in the past. Why was Norma so miffed? Because Karen idiotically was ruining the soft-sales pitch Norma was gradually needling Jack with. Norma was being VERY delicate to Jack's personal feelings about the car, and trying to reason him into doing the right thing. And what Karen said would just make him dig in his heels more. Even if Karen was right for once, it was stupid that she chose that moment to say that. But Karen is exceptionally stupid person with legendarily bad judgment. Here is the thing I didn't like: Jack even entertaining that slimy car dealer's pitch for a new Mustang. Jack was right the first time. It was impractical. The dealer's argument was that pretty soon the family would only need a car for two or three people. But that's stupid. Because they had five people RIGHT NOW. What, was he expecting two of the family to walk home off the lot? You buy a car for two or three people when you HAVE two or three people. Not before. Also, I find it very out of character that Jack didn't just walk off the lot due to the dealer's gross behavior. Jack doesn't put up with nonsense, and the dealer had no power over him. There was no reason he couldn't have left to make a statement about how much this guy sucked. Jack usually has to suck it up. He didn't in this instant, and I regret that they writers didn't let him unload on that dirtbag. Worst Kevin moment: the Narrator declaring an argument at school had "gotten personal" because the kid ragged on his father's car. After he made fun of the kid for being shot down by a girl. Kevin has misplaced priorities when it comes to how other people should be treated. ***.
The Pimple:
Being The Wonder Years, there is no episode of this show that is technically bad. But grading by the show's own high standards, this is terrible. I have nothing but complaints. First off, while having a zit is mortifying for a kid, it is of interest to exactly one person: the kid himself. Nobody else. Half the kids Kevin's at his school would be ten times more pock-marked and nobody cares. Everyone seemed SO freaking interested in Kevin's zit. I realize Kevin is the center of the show, but he isn't the center of the universe. Nobody else should care at all. Second problem: Kevin's Band-Aid excuse. Do you know what would have been a MUCH better lie? That he cut himself shaving. It makes him seem manly and nobody else could disprove it. Kevin overthinks things. Complaint The Third: the make-up on the zit was atrocious. They put zero effort into it. I think the mandate was "Make it so it is visible on camera" but on DVD it just looks awful. Fourth complaint is something I don't even think I should NEED to complain about. It should go without saying: this episode hinted that Jack was smitten with the photo of a 13 year old Gina. No. No. No. A joke like that is okay for a high school kid and his 16 or 17 year old girlfriend. It's still creepy, but that's why it's funny. 13? Check Jack's backyard for bodies. Cannot believe how stupid the writers are. *.
Math Class Squared:
"Had enough?" That one line shows why Steven Gilborn was irreplaceable. As moving as his death later in the season is, they never found another teacher as good. I love that each Collins episodes seems to be about Kevin thinking Collins is failing him, but in reality, Kevin is failing Collins. I love that he wasn't fooled by the cheating for a second, and simply dreamed up a more devastating punishment to those punks using the curve against them. Brilliant. Collins was a truly special character and Gilborn was a truly wonderful actor. ****1/2.
Rock 'N' Roll:
Jack calls Rock 'N' Roll "Noise". Which is why we love Jack. I love Larry simply telling Kevin to buy his own guitar. Sometimes the simplest solutions are the best. Paul trying to logic the band name was stupid. I have a hard time believing a kid would really have a hard time understanding that many band names are nonsense. I like Winnie both thinking Kevin looked like Paul McCartney and recognizing that he was wearing his sister's shirt at the gig. Pretty good. ***1/2.
Don't You Know Anything About Women?:
Before we beat up Kevin too badly about rejecting an awesome and interesting girl like Linda, keep in mind, girls do stuff like that too. I think it's a bit more understandable that a girl would blow off a "nice guy", just because MANY "nice guys" really aren't, and Linda is precisely as awesome as she seems. But boys do not have a monopoly on preferring vapid and substance free to cool and funky. I loved Kevin and Winnie missing each other in the last shot too. ***.
The Powers That Be:
This episode really helped me understand Jack and what a great father he is. Grandpa Arnold is lovable, friendly, gregarious... and an obnoxious ahole. It totally explains Jack's distant and angry personality. It makes sense he'd want to rebel from being a "nice guy", when nice guys are so truly horrible deep down. Grandpa's full of b.s., and Jack doesn't cotton to that. It also explains Karen a bit: rebelliousness runs in the family. That being said, Karen has NO reason to be as angry at Jack as Jack does with his father. None whatsoever. I loved Kevin realizing at the end that his father was asking for his help. I think this episode shows that Jack is LOT more of a hands-on father than the Narrator has previously claimed. He tries to sit down with Kevin and talk to him like an adult and only gets flustered and changes his mind when Grandpa does more of his usual nonsense. I think a kid would be VERY lucky to have a dad as honest and free of pretense as Jack is. And good for Jack for sticking up for Norma's cooking. Do you know why that was so great? Because he outright acknowledged that she puts a lot of time and effort into it. Norma never wants much, but appreciation is one of the few things she truly values, and I love that he did it without even putting thought into it, as an aside to how his father was treating her. And I love how it sort of embarrassed Norma too. Deep down I bet she was happy though. I love that Jack loves The Honeymooners. And his father is such a butthole he can't even let him have that. I truly feel for Jack and hope that the Narrator years later appreciates what a great dad he was. Oh, and Fred Savage and the puppy? Adorable. Lucky they did this episode when they did. It might not read as cute as it was even a year later. ****.
She, My Friend, And I:
First "To be continued" on The Wonder Years. I love that Carla broke up with Paul because he was suffocating her and she wanted to spend more time with her friends. That's hysterical. And to be blunt, I could see why Winnie would be open to a relationship with Paul. As she noted, he may not be handsome, but he definitely IS cute. Because we were all about Fred Savage back in the day, I would just like to say that Josh Saviano doesn't get enough credit for his acting ability. His hurt walk home at the end was sublime and he was able to say so much by doing so little. And Kevin's outburst at the end to Winnie was truly cringe-inducing. I can't imagine he would have thought that would have ended any other way. ****.
The St. Valentine's Day Massacre:
Lots to discuss. First off, Ben Savage was a super ugly little kid. Which is surprising because he is such a cute teenager and adult. And why does he have a curly afro while his older brother has straight hair? And I am going to gripe about the CGI heart at the end of the episode. What does this show think it is, Home Improvement? That was the final shot of a MUCH worse show and unworthy of The Wonder Years. It also steams me again to realize that Ally McBeal completely ripped off Ling's Wicked Witch of The West theme from The Wonder Years' Becky Slater. I'm glad Becky finally got a happy ending. She never deserved the amount of grief Kevin gave her. My one regret was that her soul-mate is someone as big of a tool as Craig Hobson. And I love Miss White. I kind of see what Kevin sees in her. Although I would NOT have quoted Cyrano to Kevin quite as passionately and out of context as she did. The Kevin of last year REALLY would have gotten the wrong idea. This episode was very eventful and a pivotal moment in the franchise in having Kevin and Winnie truly dating for the first time. I just wish the episode itself was better. ***1/2.
The Tree House:
I love the idea that Jack never gave Kevin The Talk. It's not even bad parenting on his end, it's just that what he and Kevin had to go through was mortifying enough, and there was nothing really he could add to that. Ever. I love how P.O.-ed Norma was by the end, and that she apparently held a grudge about it for years afterwards. That is the correct reaction. I loved Jack smiling and saying that you are never too old for a treehouse at the beginning. I think he was hoping that the bonding that happened WOULD happen. Jack is a MUCH better father than the Narrator gives him credit for. I also love that by the end of the episode, finishing the treehouse as quickly as possible sort of forged a bond between the two of them anyways. They wanted to get out of each other's hair, and only by completely being in synch would they be able to do it. There was one small moment I was VERY happy with, that nobody else probably noticed: Kevin was reading the box of cereal. That's what ALL kids do. It doesn't matter if it's Alpha Bits or something as boring as Corn Flakes like what Kevin had. The writers having Kevin do that just showed how true to childhood this show actually is. ****.
The Glee Club:
Ick. Dustin Diamond is in this. You suck, 1990. I have to agree with Kevin's original assessment of Miss Haycock: she is a lunatic. Aside from babytalking a bunch of 13 year old boys, she actually cries in front of her class and then takes off at the end, never to be seen again. And I have to call b.s. on Warren's voice changing during the performance. Kevin Arnold had the perfect childhood. But NOBODY'S childhood is that perfect. NOBODY has a memory that funny in their past. It is not true to life and very unrealistic. It turns The Wonder Years into the cutesy, cloying piece of claptrap its detractors claim it is. And it happens WAAAYYY too often. I imagine every grown-up Narrator has one or two really memorable stories about childhood in 'em. Kevin's happen every single week. The voice breaking was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I also have to call b.s. on Winnie chiding Kevin for insulting Miss Haycock. While she was right that he was being unnecessarily mean, when she said "How would you feel if it was ME up there? Would you say that to me?" I rolled my eyes. If Winnie Cooper doesn't believe the entire world revolves around her with that statement, she at least believes Kevin's life does. And the messed up thing is that it worked. She really has that kid on a tight leash. I loved Paul's solution to getting the group out of the jam: "We could practice". Seriously. Why did nobody ever point out what a brilliant idea that was? It was the correct solution, and even if it wouldn't have ultimately stopped the performance from being a disaster, it is only when the class decides to do that that they ultimately stop being miserable. And Fred Savage is NOT a bad singer. He was going for hammy as a joke, but I, like Miss Haycock, actually liked it. **1/2.
Night Out:
I think the biggest reason teenagers suck is that they always feel the need to make the most private and intimate moments public. It's gotten out of control in recent years with sexting but make-out parties are exactly as gross. Danica MacKellar is a great actress. His disgust for the proceedings was palpable, and I could tell how she hated every second of it. I don't think MacKellar is a prude in real life. I think she is a good actress. I love that they got away with Wayne calling Kevin "Scrot". At 8:00PM. In 1990. On ABC, the network with the strictest censors. They must not have known what it meant. ***1/2.
Faith:
Fun fact: Mrs. Stebbins is played by Salome Jens, who was the female Founder on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. She looks quite presentable out of that hideous make-up. I REALLY wish I had had an obituary as a writing assignment in school. I would have nailed it. Just by going as outrageous and far fetched. The first thing to note is that all ten of my clown ex-wives crowded into the tiny circus hearse and threw whoopie cushions and giant polka-dotted underwear in my casket in tribute. They also brought the severed head of the Werewolf who killed me. I love that Jack and Norma just talk out the problem at the end. Jack is and always has been reasonable. I'm sure he immediately saw how much the tax receipts things was eating Norma alive and decided to comfort her rather than berate her. I also love the Narrator's claim that his father saw the value in taxes. That's cool and completely unlike conservatives of today. We don't like paying them, but we liberals know they are the price of a free society. Conservatives believe they should just get that for nothing. Jack is the kind of conservative who isn't a total idiot. Jack's obit of himself to Kevin was, I think, a bit harsh. It was insightful, but that is NOT a thing you should tell your kid. It makes it sound like you resent them. Jack's done that before and it has always been his worst quality as parent. I love the revelation that Norma was lighting the candle for the astronauts. The world is bigger than just the Arnolds, and Kevin isn't quite old enough to realize that yet. Good episode. ***1/2.
The Unnatural:
Elephant in the room: I'm going there. Watch out. Hate me. The Wonder Years is supposed to be a period piece. And as much as my fist is punching the air at an African American like Harrison Page bossing around and humiliating a bunch of white boys, that would never happen in 1970. Or if for some strange reason it did, it would be commented on and / or be made a big deal of. There would be angry, entitled parents involved. So while the scenario is perfectly lovely for 1990, I didn't buy the exact same scenario happening in 1970 without race being brought up once. On the plus side, it's good to know that Jack isn't a racist. He seems to be an old-school Republican. I loved Kevin's fantasy of him and the coach in Korea just because it show how entirely ludicrous the idea actually was. I would have been mad if the ultimate moral WASN'T that Kevin was worried for nothing. Because that would have been idiotic. One thing I did like is learning that Winnie Cooper knows baseball. That was the last thing I expected to pop out of her mouth and I laughed that it did. **.
The Goodbye:
This is my favorite episode of The Wonder Years. There seems to be a consensus among Wonder Years fans that the Pilot is the best episode, and nothing else lived up to it, but this effected me more. I am always in tears by the end. When Fred Savage says "It's an A," I get chills. Every time. This episode is also one of the few times we get a glimpse outside of the Kevin filter. When Mr. Collins is faced away from Kevin in the parking lot, we can see he is near tears and about to lose it, until he gets it together in time to turn around and face Kevin. What is interesting about this, is that this is something the Narrator should not have known happened, but we still got to see it anyways. That is one of the reasons this episode is so special. Man, as much as I loved the episode, it was STILL a shame to lose Steven Gilborn. They never found another teacher as good, which is probably why this episode is as ultimately devastating as it is. Best episode of the series. *****.
Cocoa And Sympathy:
I think Kevin is a little TOO clueless this episode. He may be 13 but he shouldn't be this dumb. First off, I laughed at the idea that he expected Jack to be offended by Norma spending time with Paul. That would involve Jack thinking Paul Pfieffer was a threat to him and his manhood. And it would be completely stupid for him to think that. Why doesn't Kevin see that? I love that we've seen that Jack has evolved enough that he can fix dinner on his own, and if he screws it up, he'll eat cereal without complaints. The Jack of even one season ago wouldn't have done that. Kevin, do you know why your mother never told you about the singing commercial audition? You never asked! And I think Norma just won over a whole legion of nerds. Arthur Miller got Marilyn Monroe! And it's true! I was grossed out by the idea that Doug Porter was impressed when a girl shaved her legs. That suggests to me it is considered fancy and exotic, and makes me realize I would not like to live in the 1970's. And Norma breaking Paul's heart without him even realizing she was doing that just shows that there is a wisdom to Norma that we NEVER see due to the Kevin filter. That was awesome. I'd like the episode more if the main character wasn't such an idiot. ***1/2.
Daddy's Little Girl:
Karen's main problem is that she is entirely self-centered. It's all about that SHE doesn't want a cake, SHE doesn't want a party, SHE doesn't want presents. Birthday traditions aren't only observed because of the person being celebrated. The rituals mean something significant to the people throwing the parties too. It's not all about what Karen wants, or the fact that she can so easily dismiss all of the hard work her mother and father put into her birthday. Do you know what REALLY bothers me? I think in this episode, more than any other, it is quite clear that Karen has gone beyond angering Jack and into the territory of outright hurting him. For no real reason I can see. And she either doesn't care or is too stupid to realize how much this tension is costing him. Kevin's talk with Karen by the garage made her look as bizarre and out of touch to me as a space alien. And if there is ever any doubt about how great a father Jack is, the old knapsack kit of his he gave her should put those doubts to rest. It was perfect. It was a moving peace offering and show of acceptance that Karen did not deserve. I love Winnie sticking up for Karen because grrl power. What I find amusing about it, is that if Winnie actually witnessed Karen's behavior, she'd be appalled. Because Winnie is a good person. She's sticking up for a sister on principle, but she doesn't have to live with her. The episode had a MAJOR misstep and I'm docking an entire star off for it: "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" is probably the worst song selection the series ever did, especially considering the subject matter of the episode. That song is pretty much an ode to pedophilia and sung in a saucy way to make you think the singer is cutesy instead of reprehensible. I kind of feel like the producers are Michael Bluth and his niece Maeby singing "Afternoon Delight" in karaoke without having read the lyrics first. ****.
Moving:
Kevin and Winnie's hug at the end was so moving because it was real and heartfelt. When you give somebody a hug, especially a hug you REALLY mean, you aren't always going to have a cool expression on your face. Savage and McKellar played the scene exactly as vulnerably as if the camera wasn't there. And again, I love that Kevin has to learn the hard way, that all of the problems in Winnie's life stem from her brother's death. Of course that's why they're moving. I'm a little bit surprised I didn't piece it together before Kevin did (for once). I would also love to give a shout-out to the fact that Wayne is legitimately stupid. What kind of nimrod actually thinks he is going to convince his father to raise his allowance so he can pick up chicks? Has he ever MET Jack? "Get a job!" ***1/2.
Hall Pass - Roundtable With Danica McKellar, Fred Savage, And Josh Saviano:
They are absolutely right that The Wonder Years was the first show fully from the perspective of the kids. And Kevin and Winnie totally had sex in the series finale. There. I said it. ***1/2.
Featurette: A Family Affair: At Home With The Arnolds:
Olivia d'Abo states Karen is a brat and she always played her that way. Good. I hate when actors think their characters are deeper than they are. She and Jason Hervey have different takes on Karen and Wayne. Hervey thinks they were from two separate planets and Karen thinks that she saw a lot of her toughness in Wayne. I think d'Abo is probably right. We also learn once and for all about how they snuck "scrot" by the censors. Keep in mind, ABC was the network that permitted a recurring character in a family sitcom to be name "Boner". Their censors aren't the smartest people in the world. ***1/2.
Interviews:
Olivia d'Abo (Karen Arnold):
D'Abo is MUCH hotter as a middle-aged woman than she was in her early twenties. Mostly because she no longer dresses like a homeless person. d'Abo also does a lot of funny voices and accents. While they admittedly suck, it is wild to me that she DOES slip into that so easily. Why? Because she's a voice-over actress and is only ever hired to use her own voice. She could have REALLY made a living had someone had the foresight to get her to nurture her impressions. ***.
Jason Hervey (Wayne Arnold):
Hervery is quite soft-spoken in real-life and much more handsome as an adult. He says that once he learned what "scrot" meant he was horrified and didn't want to say it anymore. He also notes that Skip Cook always protected the kids and as the oldest, he had a level of independence the rest didn't. ***1/2.
Danica McKellar (Winnie Cooper):
Danica seems a little bit apologetic when people would be mad at Winnie being mad at Kevin: "I didn't write it. I'm just the messenger." I actually think it's appropriate Kevin and Winnie didn't end up together. While it might have been satisfying for shippers, it would have been quite unrealistic to real life. I love that the producers treat Fred Savage like Tom Cruise and had McKellar walk in the gutters so that she didn't tower over him after her growth spurt. And I enjoyed her talking about her math books and how parents know her from The Wonder Years while the kids know her as the girl on the cover of the books. ***1/2.
Crystal McKellar (Becky Slater):
Crystal looks as lot different as an adult than she did as a kid. She notes Dan Lauria's love of theater and points out what a good Spock impression Josh Saviano did in the Star Trek fantasy. I think her best insight was how grateful many girls were for her portrayal of a girl who stood up for herself. That was very rare at the time and Becky Slater became a feminist icon for little girls everywhere. ****.
DVD Menus: Animated. ***1/2.
Upcoming reviews include Avengers: Age Of Ultron (Blu-Ray), Marvel's Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Season 2, Marvel's Agent Carter: Season 1, The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Blu-Ray), X-Men: Days Of Future Past: The Rogue Cut, Big Hero 6 (Blu-Ray), Once Upon A Time: Season 4, The Walt Disney Studios Short Films Collection, Tangled, Phineas And Ferb: Star Wars, Star Wars Rebels: Season 1, Lego Star Wars: The New Yoda Chronicles, Muppets Most Wanted: Extended Edition, Lego DC Comics Super Heroes: Justice League: Attack Of The Legion Of Doom, Batman Unlimited: Monster Mayhem, Teen Titans Go!: House Pests, Arrow: Season 3, The Flash: Season 1, Gotham: Season 1, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey: Extended Edition, The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug: Extended Edition, Looney Tunes: Rabbits Run, Airplane! / Airplane II: The Sequel: Double Feature, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Zeo: Volume 2, Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie, Power Rangers Turbo: Volume 1, Power Rangers: Turbo: Volume 2, Power Rangers In Space Volume 1, Power Rangers In Space: Volume 2, Power Rangers Samurai: The Complete Season, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Showdown In Dimension X, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Retreat!, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Return To NYC!, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014), Mr. Peabody & Sherman, Haven: Season 5 - Vol. 1, Sleepy Hollow: Season 2, Doctor Who: Dark Water: Death In Heaven, Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Season 2, and The Jurassic Park Trilogy.
Batman Unlimited "Armored Truck Heist"
A little bland, especially since it might be the last one. **1/2.
DC Comics' Vixen "Episode 4"
I would have liked to have seen Felicity Smoak animated. That is all. ****.
Marvel's Avengers Assemble "New Frontier"
Pretty good. Anytime I get to see Hawkeye humiliated is a good day. We'll see next week how the conclusion is. ***.
Girl Meet World "Girl Meets I Am Farkle"
Normally I'd compliment this show on being the first Disney Channel show for tackling autism and Asperger's, but by saying Farkle DOESN'T have it (when he clearly does) is a really bad idea for a "Happy ending". Because it implies there is something wrong with it. I appreciate the show having Smackle as an audience surrogate, but by saying Farkle DOESN'T have it, they're saying there's something wrong with people who do.
And Maya and Riley firmly screaming he doesn't have it made me cringe because it was again another way to say that Asperger's is a bad thing. It's not. It's not a good thing or a bad thing. It's just a thing. And I'd feel a lot better if Maya and Riley hadn't just acted so clearly judgmental about it.
Good seeing Finkus and Monster again though. **1/2.
Transformers: Robots In Disguise "Battleground, Part 2"
Megatron NAMED himself after Megatronus? Genius! It not only keeps the integrity of Megatron's reformation, but it is implies the new guy is even worse! Brilliant!
"Rev up and roll out" is not any better than anything else Bumblebee said this season. Good to know that lame joke will be retired now though.
And Optimus is gonna stick around? Sweet! Season two should be much better than season one just based on that.
Good finale. ****.
Power Rangers: Dino Charge "Break Out"
Funny story: for the first five minutes I was watching this, I was pretty sure I was watching a rerun. That's how formula these things are.
The Gold Ranger was not set-up properly at all. I get that's how Power Rangers rolls, but that doesn't mean I won't call them on that.
Bad. *.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 1: Where Are The Heroes?"
These webisodes help us play catch-up from the series finale to the sequel. That girl's brother being impressed was so awesome because it totally could have gone the other way. ****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 2: Phoebe"
I couldn't tell what was going on in the second half of this but that ending was cool. ***1/2.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 3: Registered"
Oh, I get it. This is gonna be X-Men. The webisodes have saltier language than either the TV series or previous webisodes did. It's a bit jarring. ***1/2.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 4: June 13th"
Terrorist leader Mohinder Suresh. That's a little too cute by half. Something else is going on. Mohinder wouldn't be the first EVO framed for something he didn't do. *****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 5: Renautas"
Mohinder as fall guy makes sense. He's always been a total sap. I think holding a lighter up to a guy's ear is the same as sticking your finger in their back. And surprisingly, just as effective. *****.
Heroes Reborn: Dark Matters "Chapter 6: Where The Truth Lies"
Okay, just based on the web series and the behind the scenes promos, I'm going to predict something: the new season of Heroes is gonna be awesome. May if there is another season after that it will start sucking again, but this update is exactly what the franchise needed. I am officially excited in a way I have never been before.
Micah? Makes perfect sense and I should have suspected him from the start. I love that it looks like the story of the webisode series will actually continue in the series itself. We may actually get resolution for Quentin and Phoebe in a way we never did for Caitlin. I am impressed and can't wait for the series. *****.
The Wonder Years: Season Three
I'm very surprised. This season was a LOT better than I remembered it. I remember loving "The Goodbye" but I never was wowed by any season after season two back when it aired. This is actually still quite good. Whether the rest of the series is better than I remembered is an open question for seasons four through six, but we'll see soon enough.
The best episodes are the three Mr. Collins ones (Math Class / Math Class Squared / The Goodbye). "The Goodbye" is actually my pick for best episode of the series. "Mom Wars" is also fantastic. The worst episodes were one of the few total misfires on the show (The Pimple) and the credibility straining "The Unnatural". "The Glee Club" is also a low point, mainly due to the fact that the scenario it posits is TOO perfect, therefore also completely unrealistic. Season Overall: ****.
Summer Song:
Kevin's summer romance was unbearably sweet and the fact that that was the only letter Teri wrote him broke my heart. But I have to state that Karen is the most obnoxious person on the face of the Earth. There is a point where being rebellious just turns into being mean and rude. For someone who claims to be a flower child, Karen doesn't seem very mellow to me. ****.
Math Class:
Steven Gilborn was such an amazingly gifted actor. He gave so much using so little. Do you know what I love about Kevin? How hard he tries. That makes me root for him. He possesses enough shame to realize him leaning over was a low point in his education. That's how you can tells Collins is an amazing teacher. He makes Kevin want to work harder. ****1/2.
Wayne On Wheels:
The worst thing about Wayne's maliciousness is that it is unwarranted. It is unnecessary. It is overkill. He gains nothing from it, and always winds up the worse for it. The look Dan Lauria gives as he picks the cornstalk off the wheel of the car was as priceless as any Robert Picardo ever gave as Coach Cutlip. But man, Wayne is beyond cruel for the sake of being cruel. I mean seriously, I would have never even THOUGHT of trying to humiliate my sister in front of her boyfriend as a kid. I always thought that stuff was off-limits between siblings. At least between siblings where both of them are older than 8 years of age. As interesting as Wayne's "Are you okay?" was in humanizing the kid (first time we're ever seen him be serious or look out for his brother) just the fact that the Narrator actually states that that was the first time his brother ever said that speaks volumes. That's something EVERYBODY says to a family member after a close call, and the fact that this was SUCH a huge moment that Kevin actually realized the historic nature of it shows that Wayne is pretty much a terrible person. Even terrible people can get spooked once in a while and let down their defenses for five seconds. That doesn't make them less terrible. By the way? LOVE the extended theme song. Joe Cocker ruled. ****.
Mom Wars:
Norma's behavior during this was quite shrewd, calculating, and cunning. I never realized how secretly on-the-ball she was, but she is. The store announcer saying over the intercom that Kevin Arnold has a large space in his crotch is a classic Wonder Years joke. It is literally the first show that would ever come up with a joke like that. The kid who played Doug Porter played young Ben Hanscomb in Stephen King's IT. Dan Lauria had some great reaction shots in this episode too. My favorite moment was him giving Kevin permission to play football, Norma overriding him, and him telling Kevin to listen to his mother. I love that moment because it shows that Norma IS an equal parent, and despite Jack being so conservative and sexist, still treats his wife with deference on certain matters. It didn't matter enough for him to get into a big fight about it, so he simply trusts her judgment without a second thought. I love that this show does that. It is part of why the parents on The Wonder Years seem so real. Also giving a shout-out to the song at the end. I LOVE "The Circle Game". ****1/2.
On The Spot:
The revelation that Winnie's father moved back in with her family gives the episode resonance it might not otherwise have had without that last sentence from the Narrator. Because we realize that Winnie was absolutely right to treat the play as life and death. I like that Kevin's perspective is that acting in a play sucks (with some nice continuity from last season). That's interesting, because Kevin was actually pretty good at it, and didn't struggle with it the way Winnie did. I love the idea that the kid who doesn't care is blessed with the raw talent, but the kid it REALLY matters to has to work for it a bit. I think Kevin's response to Winnie WAS insensitive, but to be fair, I think everything he said was fine until he told her she was just in the play to get out of 7th period. That was dumb. I also love how Kevin treats Paul's spotlight nonsense as that: nonsense. And for once, he's right. But the messed up thing is that BECAUSE Paul took it so seriously, he got "backstage fright" (heh), and forced Kevin to take charge and basically save the entire play when that was the last thing Kevin was expecting to happen. I think he knew he could handle it, but a guy could use a little warning. Karen uses the word "bourgeois" a lot but I'd be surprised if she actually knew what it meant. You can teach a parrot to squawk "Bourgeois! Bourgeois!" all you want, but in the end, it's still a parrot, and not a liberal. ***1/2.
Odd Man Out:
"The McCovey is off the table!" Kevin is the bad guy in this episode. There is no part of his behavior to his friends that isn't deplorable. I love that he and Paul haggle over cards using old man language: "You've been trying to pawn that Shwartz off on me for years!". I really like Doug Porter. Kevin thinks his agreeable nature makes him a doormat and somebody to take advantage of, but in reality, it just makes him a great friend. That's not the message Kevin gets, and I'm not even sure if the episode wants us to find Doug as anything but pathetic, but just the fact that he immediately clicked with Randy shows that this guy is somebody who is going to be very popular someday, and probably with the ladies too. Women (not girls) truly dig courteous men. And Doug is the most polite guy on the planet. Truly nice people, who put other people first, without even thinking twice about it are a rarity, and I don't really think should be looked down upon. Because when they find the right friend, they are going to be amazing. Doug has a bright future ahead of him. He is nowhere near as pathetic as the Narrator thinks he is. And I think the fact that the episode tries to get us to think he is, shows that the episode itself is fundamentally flawed. Kevin didn't screw up because he hurt the feelings of a loser. He screwed up because he blew his chance to have the best friend possible. And if the episode tries to get the moral to read any other way, it is simply wrong. **1/2.
The Family Car:
Some things I like, some things I didn't. Things I liked: Norma. She is the house peacemaker and knows exactly what to say to get Jack to change his mind and get a new car. How great are her reasoning skills? He asks her if she is aware of the amount of money he puts into the car and she starts itemizing it! She was prepared for that argument! That's awesome! I think that's probably why she was so angry at Karen for calling her father a cheapskate. Because, let's face it, that is the first insult Karen has ever leveled at her father that was actually true. And she's said MUCH worse stuff in the past. Why was Norma so miffed? Because Karen idiotically was ruining the soft-sales pitch Norma was gradually needling Jack with. Norma was being VERY delicate to Jack's personal feelings about the car, and trying to reason him into doing the right thing. And what Karen said would just make him dig in his heels more. Even if Karen was right for once, it was stupid that she chose that moment to say that. But Karen is exceptionally stupid person with legendarily bad judgment. Here is the thing I didn't like: Jack even entertaining that slimy car dealer's pitch for a new Mustang. Jack was right the first time. It was impractical. The dealer's argument was that pretty soon the family would only need a car for two or three people. But that's stupid. Because they had five people RIGHT NOW. What, was he expecting two of the family to walk home off the lot? You buy a car for two or three people when you HAVE two or three people. Not before. Also, I find it very out of character that Jack didn't just walk off the lot due to the dealer's gross behavior. Jack doesn't put up with nonsense, and the dealer had no power over him. There was no reason he couldn't have left to make a statement about how much this guy sucked. Jack usually has to suck it up. He didn't in this instant, and I regret that they writers didn't let him unload on that dirtbag. Worst Kevin moment: the Narrator declaring an argument at school had "gotten personal" because the kid ragged on his father's car. After he made fun of the kid for being shot down by a girl. Kevin has misplaced priorities when it comes to how other people should be treated. ***.
The Pimple:
Being The Wonder Years, there is no episode of this show that is technically bad. But grading by the show's own high standards, this is terrible. I have nothing but complaints. First off, while having a zit is mortifying for a kid, it is of interest to exactly one person: the kid himself. Nobody else. Half the kids Kevin's at his school would be ten times more pock-marked and nobody cares. Everyone seemed SO freaking interested in Kevin's zit. I realize Kevin is the center of the show, but he isn't the center of the universe. Nobody else should care at all. Second problem: Kevin's Band-Aid excuse. Do you know what would have been a MUCH better lie? That he cut himself shaving. It makes him seem manly and nobody else could disprove it. Kevin overthinks things. Complaint The Third: the make-up on the zit was atrocious. They put zero effort into it. I think the mandate was "Make it so it is visible on camera" but on DVD it just looks awful. Fourth complaint is something I don't even think I should NEED to complain about. It should go without saying: this episode hinted that Jack was smitten with the photo of a 13 year old Gina. No. No. No. A joke like that is okay for a high school kid and his 16 or 17 year old girlfriend. It's still creepy, but that's why it's funny. 13? Check Jack's backyard for bodies. Cannot believe how stupid the writers are. *.
Math Class Squared:
"Had enough?" That one line shows why Steven Gilborn was irreplaceable. As moving as his death later in the season is, they never found another teacher as good. I love that each Collins episodes seems to be about Kevin thinking Collins is failing him, but in reality, Kevin is failing Collins. I love that he wasn't fooled by the cheating for a second, and simply dreamed up a more devastating punishment to those punks using the curve against them. Brilliant. Collins was a truly special character and Gilborn was a truly wonderful actor. ****1/2.
Rock 'N' Roll:
Jack calls Rock 'N' Roll "Noise". Which is why we love Jack. I love Larry simply telling Kevin to buy his own guitar. Sometimes the simplest solutions are the best. Paul trying to logic the band name was stupid. I have a hard time believing a kid would really have a hard time understanding that many band names are nonsense. I like Winnie both thinking Kevin looked like Paul McCartney and recognizing that he was wearing his sister's shirt at the gig. Pretty good. ***1/2.
Don't You Know Anything About Women?:
Before we beat up Kevin too badly about rejecting an awesome and interesting girl like Linda, keep in mind, girls do stuff like that too. I think it's a bit more understandable that a girl would blow off a "nice guy", just because MANY "nice guys" really aren't, and Linda is precisely as awesome as she seems. But boys do not have a monopoly on preferring vapid and substance free to cool and funky. I loved Kevin and Winnie missing each other in the last shot too. ***.
The Powers That Be:
This episode really helped me understand Jack and what a great father he is. Grandpa Arnold is lovable, friendly, gregarious... and an obnoxious ahole. It totally explains Jack's distant and angry personality. It makes sense he'd want to rebel from being a "nice guy", when nice guys are so truly horrible deep down. Grandpa's full of b.s., and Jack doesn't cotton to that. It also explains Karen a bit: rebelliousness runs in the family. That being said, Karen has NO reason to be as angry at Jack as Jack does with his father. None whatsoever. I loved Kevin realizing at the end that his father was asking for his help. I think this episode shows that Jack is LOT more of a hands-on father than the Narrator has previously claimed. He tries to sit down with Kevin and talk to him like an adult and only gets flustered and changes his mind when Grandpa does more of his usual nonsense. I think a kid would be VERY lucky to have a dad as honest and free of pretense as Jack is. And good for Jack for sticking up for Norma's cooking. Do you know why that was so great? Because he outright acknowledged that she puts a lot of time and effort into it. Norma never wants much, but appreciation is one of the few things she truly values, and I love that he did it without even putting thought into it, as an aside to how his father was treating her. And I love how it sort of embarrassed Norma too. Deep down I bet she was happy though. I love that Jack loves The Honeymooners. And his father is such a butthole he can't even let him have that. I truly feel for Jack and hope that the Narrator years later appreciates what a great dad he was. Oh, and Fred Savage and the puppy? Adorable. Lucky they did this episode when they did. It might not read as cute as it was even a year later. ****.
She, My Friend, And I:
First "To be continued" on The Wonder Years. I love that Carla broke up with Paul because he was suffocating her and she wanted to spend more time with her friends. That's hysterical. And to be blunt, I could see why Winnie would be open to a relationship with Paul. As she noted, he may not be handsome, but he definitely IS cute. Because we were all about Fred Savage back in the day, I would just like to say that Josh Saviano doesn't get enough credit for his acting ability. His hurt walk home at the end was sublime and he was able to say so much by doing so little. And Kevin's outburst at the end to Winnie was truly cringe-inducing. I can't imagine he would have thought that would have ended any other way. ****.
The St. Valentine's Day Massacre:
Lots to discuss. First off, Ben Savage was a super ugly little kid. Which is surprising because he is such a cute teenager and adult. And why does he have a curly afro while his older brother has straight hair? And I am going to gripe about the CGI heart at the end of the episode. What does this show think it is, Home Improvement? That was the final shot of a MUCH worse show and unworthy of The Wonder Years. It also steams me again to realize that Ally McBeal completely ripped off Ling's Wicked Witch of The West theme from The Wonder Years' Becky Slater. I'm glad Becky finally got a happy ending. She never deserved the amount of grief Kevin gave her. My one regret was that her soul-mate is someone as big of a tool as Craig Hobson. And I love Miss White. I kind of see what Kevin sees in her. Although I would NOT have quoted Cyrano to Kevin quite as passionately and out of context as she did. The Kevin of last year REALLY would have gotten the wrong idea. This episode was very eventful and a pivotal moment in the franchise in having Kevin and Winnie truly dating for the first time. I just wish the episode itself was better. ***1/2.
The Tree House:
I love the idea that Jack never gave Kevin The Talk. It's not even bad parenting on his end, it's just that what he and Kevin had to go through was mortifying enough, and there was nothing really he could add to that. Ever. I love how P.O.-ed Norma was by the end, and that she apparently held a grudge about it for years afterwards. That is the correct reaction. I loved Jack smiling and saying that you are never too old for a treehouse at the beginning. I think he was hoping that the bonding that happened WOULD happen. Jack is a MUCH better father than the Narrator gives him credit for. I also love that by the end of the episode, finishing the treehouse as quickly as possible sort of forged a bond between the two of them anyways. They wanted to get out of each other's hair, and only by completely being in synch would they be able to do it. There was one small moment I was VERY happy with, that nobody else probably noticed: Kevin was reading the box of cereal. That's what ALL kids do. It doesn't matter if it's Alpha Bits or something as boring as Corn Flakes like what Kevin had. The writers having Kevin do that just showed how true to childhood this show actually is. ****.
The Glee Club:
Ick. Dustin Diamond is in this. You suck, 1990. I have to agree with Kevin's original assessment of Miss Haycock: she is a lunatic. Aside from babytalking a bunch of 13 year old boys, she actually cries in front of her class and then takes off at the end, never to be seen again. And I have to call b.s. on Warren's voice changing during the performance. Kevin Arnold had the perfect childhood. But NOBODY'S childhood is that perfect. NOBODY has a memory that funny in their past. It is not true to life and very unrealistic. It turns The Wonder Years into the cutesy, cloying piece of claptrap its detractors claim it is. And it happens WAAAYYY too often. I imagine every grown-up Narrator has one or two really memorable stories about childhood in 'em. Kevin's happen every single week. The voice breaking was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I also have to call b.s. on Winnie chiding Kevin for insulting Miss Haycock. While she was right that he was being unnecessarily mean, when she said "How would you feel if it was ME up there? Would you say that to me?" I rolled my eyes. If Winnie Cooper doesn't believe the entire world revolves around her with that statement, she at least believes Kevin's life does. And the messed up thing is that it worked. She really has that kid on a tight leash. I loved Paul's solution to getting the group out of the jam: "We could practice". Seriously. Why did nobody ever point out what a brilliant idea that was? It was the correct solution, and even if it wouldn't have ultimately stopped the performance from being a disaster, it is only when the class decides to do that that they ultimately stop being miserable. And Fred Savage is NOT a bad singer. He was going for hammy as a joke, but I, like Miss Haycock, actually liked it. **1/2.
Night Out:
I think the biggest reason teenagers suck is that they always feel the need to make the most private and intimate moments public. It's gotten out of control in recent years with sexting but make-out parties are exactly as gross. Danica MacKellar is a great actress. His disgust for the proceedings was palpable, and I could tell how she hated every second of it. I don't think MacKellar is a prude in real life. I think she is a good actress. I love that they got away with Wayne calling Kevin "Scrot". At 8:00PM. In 1990. On ABC, the network with the strictest censors. They must not have known what it meant. ***1/2.
Faith:
Fun fact: Mrs. Stebbins is played by Salome Jens, who was the female Founder on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. She looks quite presentable out of that hideous make-up. I REALLY wish I had had an obituary as a writing assignment in school. I would have nailed it. Just by going as outrageous and far fetched. The first thing to note is that all ten of my clown ex-wives crowded into the tiny circus hearse and threw whoopie cushions and giant polka-dotted underwear in my casket in tribute. They also brought the severed head of the Werewolf who killed me. I love that Jack and Norma just talk out the problem at the end. Jack is and always has been reasonable. I'm sure he immediately saw how much the tax receipts things was eating Norma alive and decided to comfort her rather than berate her. I also love the Narrator's claim that his father saw the value in taxes. That's cool and completely unlike conservatives of today. We don't like paying them, but we liberals know they are the price of a free society. Conservatives believe they should just get that for nothing. Jack is the kind of conservative who isn't a total idiot. Jack's obit of himself to Kevin was, I think, a bit harsh. It was insightful, but that is NOT a thing you should tell your kid. It makes it sound like you resent them. Jack's done that before and it has always been his worst quality as parent. I love the revelation that Norma was lighting the candle for the astronauts. The world is bigger than just the Arnolds, and Kevin isn't quite old enough to realize that yet. Good episode. ***1/2.
The Unnatural:
Elephant in the room: I'm going there. Watch out. Hate me. The Wonder Years is supposed to be a period piece. And as much as my fist is punching the air at an African American like Harrison Page bossing around and humiliating a bunch of white boys, that would never happen in 1970. Or if for some strange reason it did, it would be commented on and / or be made a big deal of. There would be angry, entitled parents involved. So while the scenario is perfectly lovely for 1990, I didn't buy the exact same scenario happening in 1970 without race being brought up once. On the plus side, it's good to know that Jack isn't a racist. He seems to be an old-school Republican. I loved Kevin's fantasy of him and the coach in Korea just because it show how entirely ludicrous the idea actually was. I would have been mad if the ultimate moral WASN'T that Kevin was worried for nothing. Because that would have been idiotic. One thing I did like is learning that Winnie Cooper knows baseball. That was the last thing I expected to pop out of her mouth and I laughed that it did. **.
The Goodbye:
This is my favorite episode of The Wonder Years. There seems to be a consensus among Wonder Years fans that the Pilot is the best episode, and nothing else lived up to it, but this effected me more. I am always in tears by the end. When Fred Savage says "It's an A," I get chills. Every time. This episode is also one of the few times we get a glimpse outside of the Kevin filter. When Mr. Collins is faced away from Kevin in the parking lot, we can see he is near tears and about to lose it, until he gets it together in time to turn around and face Kevin. What is interesting about this, is that this is something the Narrator should not have known happened, but we still got to see it anyways. That is one of the reasons this episode is so special. Man, as much as I loved the episode, it was STILL a shame to lose Steven Gilborn. They never found another teacher as good, which is probably why this episode is as ultimately devastating as it is. Best episode of the series. *****.
Cocoa And Sympathy:
I think Kevin is a little TOO clueless this episode. He may be 13 but he shouldn't be this dumb. First off, I laughed at the idea that he expected Jack to be offended by Norma spending time with Paul. That would involve Jack thinking Paul Pfieffer was a threat to him and his manhood. And it would be completely stupid for him to think that. Why doesn't Kevin see that? I love that we've seen that Jack has evolved enough that he can fix dinner on his own, and if he screws it up, he'll eat cereal without complaints. The Jack of even one season ago wouldn't have done that. Kevin, do you know why your mother never told you about the singing commercial audition? You never asked! And I think Norma just won over a whole legion of nerds. Arthur Miller got Marilyn Monroe! And it's true! I was grossed out by the idea that Doug Porter was impressed when a girl shaved her legs. That suggests to me it is considered fancy and exotic, and makes me realize I would not like to live in the 1970's. And Norma breaking Paul's heart without him even realizing she was doing that just shows that there is a wisdom to Norma that we NEVER see due to the Kevin filter. That was awesome. I'd like the episode more if the main character wasn't such an idiot. ***1/2.
Daddy's Little Girl:
Karen's main problem is that she is entirely self-centered. It's all about that SHE doesn't want a cake, SHE doesn't want a party, SHE doesn't want presents. Birthday traditions aren't only observed because of the person being celebrated. The rituals mean something significant to the people throwing the parties too. It's not all about what Karen wants, or the fact that she can so easily dismiss all of the hard work her mother and father put into her birthday. Do you know what REALLY bothers me? I think in this episode, more than any other, it is quite clear that Karen has gone beyond angering Jack and into the territory of outright hurting him. For no real reason I can see. And she either doesn't care or is too stupid to realize how much this tension is costing him. Kevin's talk with Karen by the garage made her look as bizarre and out of touch to me as a space alien. And if there is ever any doubt about how great a father Jack is, the old knapsack kit of his he gave her should put those doubts to rest. It was perfect. It was a moving peace offering and show of acceptance that Karen did not deserve. I love Winnie sticking up for Karen because grrl power. What I find amusing about it, is that if Winnie actually witnessed Karen's behavior, she'd be appalled. Because Winnie is a good person. She's sticking up for a sister on principle, but she doesn't have to live with her. The episode had a MAJOR misstep and I'm docking an entire star off for it: "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" is probably the worst song selection the series ever did, especially considering the subject matter of the episode. That song is pretty much an ode to pedophilia and sung in a saucy way to make you think the singer is cutesy instead of reprehensible. I kind of feel like the producers are Michael Bluth and his niece Maeby singing "Afternoon Delight" in karaoke without having read the lyrics first. ****.
Moving:
Kevin and Winnie's hug at the end was so moving because it was real and heartfelt. When you give somebody a hug, especially a hug you REALLY mean, you aren't always going to have a cool expression on your face. Savage and McKellar played the scene exactly as vulnerably as if the camera wasn't there. And again, I love that Kevin has to learn the hard way, that all of the problems in Winnie's life stem from her brother's death. Of course that's why they're moving. I'm a little bit surprised I didn't piece it together before Kevin did (for once). I would also love to give a shout-out to the fact that Wayne is legitimately stupid. What kind of nimrod actually thinks he is going to convince his father to raise his allowance so he can pick up chicks? Has he ever MET Jack? "Get a job!" ***1/2.
Hall Pass - Roundtable With Danica McKellar, Fred Savage, And Josh Saviano:
They are absolutely right that The Wonder Years was the first show fully from the perspective of the kids. And Kevin and Winnie totally had sex in the series finale. There. I said it. ***1/2.
Featurette: A Family Affair: At Home With The Arnolds:
Olivia d'Abo states Karen is a brat and she always played her that way. Good. I hate when actors think their characters are deeper than they are. She and Jason Hervey have different takes on Karen and Wayne. Hervey thinks they were from two separate planets and Karen thinks that she saw a lot of her toughness in Wayne. I think d'Abo is probably right. We also learn once and for all about how they snuck "scrot" by the censors. Keep in mind, ABC was the network that permitted a recurring character in a family sitcom to be name "Boner". Their censors aren't the smartest people in the world. ***1/2.
Interviews:
Olivia d'Abo (Karen Arnold):
D'Abo is MUCH hotter as a middle-aged woman than she was in her early twenties. Mostly because she no longer dresses like a homeless person. d'Abo also does a lot of funny voices and accents. While they admittedly suck, it is wild to me that she DOES slip into that so easily. Why? Because she's a voice-over actress and is only ever hired to use her own voice. She could have REALLY made a living had someone had the foresight to get her to nurture her impressions. ***.
Jason Hervey (Wayne Arnold):
Hervery is quite soft-spoken in real-life and much more handsome as an adult. He says that once he learned what "scrot" meant he was horrified and didn't want to say it anymore. He also notes that Skip Cook always protected the kids and as the oldest, he had a level of independence the rest didn't. ***1/2.
Danica McKellar (Winnie Cooper):
Danica seems a little bit apologetic when people would be mad at Winnie being mad at Kevin: "I didn't write it. I'm just the messenger." I actually think it's appropriate Kevin and Winnie didn't end up together. While it might have been satisfying for shippers, it would have been quite unrealistic to real life. I love that the producers treat Fred Savage like Tom Cruise and had McKellar walk in the gutters so that she didn't tower over him after her growth spurt. And I enjoyed her talking about her math books and how parents know her from The Wonder Years while the kids know her as the girl on the cover of the books. ***1/2.
Crystal McKellar (Becky Slater):
Crystal looks as lot different as an adult than she did as a kid. She notes Dan Lauria's love of theater and points out what a good Spock impression Josh Saviano did in the Star Trek fantasy. I think her best insight was how grateful many girls were for her portrayal of a girl who stood up for herself. That was very rare at the time and Becky Slater became a feminist icon for little girls everywhere. ****.
DVD Menus: Animated. ***1/2.
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no subject
Date: 2015-10-04 11:16 pm (UTC)Girl Meet World "Girl Meets I Am Farkle" - But if he did have it, would the audience still be able to laugh at him?
The St. Valentine's Day Massacre: Wicked Witch theme?
Faith: Clown ex-wives. Of course.
Hall Pass - Roundtable With Danica McKellar, Fred Savage, And Josh Saviano: Was it ever a question that they didn't?
Jason Hervey (Wayne Arnold): That's unfortunate because "scrot" should be said more often.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-05 12:55 am (UTC)The St. Valentine's Day Massacre: From the Wizard of Oz. Most famous during the tornado.
Faith: Of course.
Hall Pass - Roundtable With Danica McKellar, Fred Savage, And Josh Saviano: Actually, yes. It was left an open question in many people's minds and they brought up here how mad fans were at how ambiguous the moment was compared to other scenes where a major character loses their virginity. It can be read either way.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-07 03:02 am (UTC)Leonard: (Set-up)
Sheldon: (Something weird.)
Leonard: Seek help.
::cue laughter::
The St. Valentine's Day Massacre: Wow, I must've forgotten! Candace on Phineas and Ferb has it too. Pretty common, apparently, but it is unmistakable.
Hall Pass - Roundtable With Danica McKellar, Fred Savage, And Josh Saviano: Oh yeah, good point, there really wasn't a reason to make it ambiguous.
no subject
Date: 2015-10-07 06:14 am (UTC)