Rachel Maddow to receive the Walter Cronkite Faith & Freedom Award

[matt_zimmer]

http://www.baywindows.com/index.php?ch=news&sc=glbt&sc2=news&sc3=&id=109237

Wow, so I guess Greg X was right that there is no difference between Maddow and Glenn Beck. [/snark off]

Someday I'll tell the whole story of why I left Toon Zone for good (I'm never going back) but for now I'll just say that Greg X is a complete jerk.

Comments

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

I keep meaning to post the whole story on my journal but I keep putting it off. Partly because it's kind of painful (I LOVE Toon Zone) and partly because I'll come off looking pretty badly in my eyes at least. I've been having a really hard time with it lately so it will probably be cathardic to finally get it off my chest.

One of the reasons my journal has been light on personal stuff recently is because I'm afraid of offending anyone. I always think that if someone doesn't post a response right away it's because they think I'm a moron.

[stinkingbishop.livejournal.com]

I don't think I've ever heard of Rachel Maddow before, so that's my excuse on not replying.

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

Yeah, you're pretty good about replying quickly to my posts. I'm just not sure I could take the suspense if I posted the whole story. I'll think about it.

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

Don't be that hard on yourself, from the sound of it, there was blame placed all around. And your LJ friends aren't exactly the judgmental type. I'm sure you'll feel better about it afterwards.

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

The problem is I have a mental illness and I always see things worse than they actually are. I'm afraid if I post it and don't get a response right away I'll pull out my hair in anxious anticipation. I think I'm going to do it today (I'm feeling more courageous than usual but I'll probably need to do some pacing or go on the treadmill to build up the nerve.)

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

You've brought up the mental illness and the fear thing before, and I totally understand. But you know what, I've seen you work through all that and still confront your demons and find your courage. You're one of the bravest guys I've never met.

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

I'm really not. If you met me you'll see I get scared at the drop of a hat. It's part of my PTSD. Even accidentally bumping into someone at the store causes a panic attack and any bad thoughts give me flashbacks.

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

That's my point, though. That PTSD makes you feel that way, and you know there's a chance of panic attacks, and yet you still have the strength to get up in the morning. That's bravery.

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

Not really. My life isn't that stressful. It's just my bad thoughts that make it SEEM that way.

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

But you don't let those bad thoughts defeat you, and that's admirable. Learn to take a compliment, willya?!

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

Considering not being brave is my greatest weakness, it's the one thing I can't accept a compliment on.

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

Fine, let me put it this way, through dealing with your condition, you've developed a kind of strength that most people don't know.

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

I can handle that. :)

[90scartoonman.livejournal.com]

Excellent :)

[mattzimmer.livejournal.com]

:D