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matt_zimmerReviews for Volume Two of Rescue Rangers, A Sesame Street Christmas Carol, Olive the Other Reindeer, and the latest issue of Walt Disney's Comics and Stories.
I've come to a distressing conclusion after seeing the second volume of Rescue Rangers on DVD.
Chip is a butthole.
And I say butthole merely because it is the kindest word I can call him. I can't think of any Disney Afternoon cartoon character I'd rather spend less time with than Chip. He's uptight, mean, controlling and overbearing. I have a plushie Chip and I love him to death but the Rescue Rangers version is a type A butthole. A real knee-biter.
Dale is da man. Not so much because of anything like clever dialogue (which on this cliched show is noticably absent) but simply because Corey Burton delivers a brilliant, cartoony performance. He SELLS Dale by saying everything with zeal and gusto and conviction. You believe everything Dale says because HE believes it. It's a real shame that this show gave Gadget and Chip an "almost" romance because her innocence and earnestness would have been perfect for Dale.
And Monterey Jack? Has there ever been a more useless member of a crime-fighting team? Seriously, his cheese cravings (aside from being lame) routinely put the group in jeopardy. About halfway through the set I was wishing the rest of the gang would just tie and gag him lock him in his room whenever they left the tree on business. If he had half a brain he would be dangerous. Chip is always complaining about how much trouble Dale causes but if I hired a group of detectives to find my missing puppy, if Monterey Jack was on the case, I wouldn't get a wink of sleep for weeks.
The other thing that really bothers me about the Rescue Rangers is the serious lack of trust between the teammates. At random the writers pick one person in the group to have seen something extraordinary whether it is hurricanes robbing banks, rooms spinning, or zombie inducing mosquitoes and the rest of the team refuses to believe them and tell each other that the person has "cracked" or has gone insane. If I had ever had a "friend" talk to me in such a condescending manner I would kick them square in the nootz. Of course if they WERE believed right away, about a third of the episodes would pretty much have to lose their second acts.
I had fun watching this set. A lot. Because even though I was fourteen when the show premiered I don't think I was truly able to to appreciate the disfunction and animosity between the teammates. It's like all five members are variations on Flash and Green Lantern. SEASON ONE Flash and Green Lantern. ***.
Rescue Rangers To the Rescue: Out of all of the multi-part pilots of the various Disney Afternoon shows To the Rescue is easily the weakest. Very mundane and boring and everything about it is phoned in. We never even saw Drake, Klawdane, and the bulldog ever again so it seemed like a waste of time. Good points? Part one has Fat Cat's catchy musical number "The Best of Everything" set to some beautiful animation. I wish the rest of the five parter had more highlights that much fun. **1/2
A Creep in the Deep: Boring episode. I liked the concept of a fish Naplolean but the episode itself was yawn inducing. **1/2.
Normie's Science Project: Remember when Disney cartoons weren't so utterly humorless that they could actually have villains saying lines like "You can't ever expect to be taken seriously as an evil genius unless you flatten a city"? No. I don't blame you. It's been a Loooooooonnnnng time. ***.
Seer No Evil: This is why I hate Chip. That moth's psychic predictions ALL came true (even the sccchhht! across the neck part) and Chip is STILL a non-believer. I think if Chip was Mulder's partner he'd have hung himself. ***1/2.
Chipwrecked Shipmunks: Second and last appearance of the Pi-Rats. It's a shame. I like how dangerous they are and willing to kill the Rangers at a drop of a hat even if they ARE their friends. The episode was boring though. **1/2.
When Mice Were Men: Boring Monterey Jack spotlight with bullfighting. I'll give the episode credit though: they actually made Monty sympathetic throughout. **1/2.
Chocolate Chips: The Rescue Rangers all DESERVE to be mosquito zombies. AND dipped in chocolate. Poor Dale. **.
The Last Leprecaun: Very unpredictable episode (a RARITY for this show) so I'll give it ***.
Whether Or Not: I have a question. Dale believes in fantastic things. I get that. But as flawed as Monterey Jack is, when has he EVER given the Rangers reason to think he was hallucinating something fantastic? Serious trust issues in the group. Messed up. *1/2.
One-Upsman Chip: On the one hand this episode had Chip blaming himself for getting Dale into trouble. On the other hand, why is it the first fun thing he's EVER done on the series caused him this much grief? Now he'll ALWAYS be a stick in the mud. **1/2.
Shell-Shocked: I want to know exactly what scientific journals Fat Cat has been reading by thinking lining up a group of giant shells will attrach fish. Cause in Disney Cartoonland it actually works. **1/2.
Love is a Many Splintered Thing: Oh, Monty's ex is a piece of WORK. Wow. She is the ex-girlfriend from Hell. However when Chip started instantly sniping at her I immediately took her side. I think if the writer's were hoping to get us to cast doubts on Desiree it was a huge mistake for them to have Chip be the one to question her story. Because he IS, y'know, a butthole. ***.
Song of the Night 'N' Dale: I love this episode. The Emperor is such a lovable character as is his pet parakeet Chirp Sing. And Dale practically has a tour de force this episode. THIS is the sanity questioning scenario done right. Not forced at all. And the animation is beautiful here too. ****1/2.
Double 'O Chipmunk: This episode has a TON of things going for it: Chip getting repeatedly hurt and humiliated, Dale actually getting to have a slew of herioc moments, and Gadget giving Dale a steamy kiss which for Dale/ Gadget shippers gives us a grand total of shipper moments of... one. I love Corey Burton and the enthusiasm he injects Dale with. I was glad he finally got an episode in which HE was the hero. ****.
Gadget Goes Hawaiian: As far as doppelganger episodes go this one isn't too bad, ESPECIALLY since they had the sense to make Gadget's doppelganger the ANTI-GADGET FROM HELL! ***.
It's a Bird, It's Insane, It's Dale!: Okay, Dale WAS kind of a jerk this episode but he was SO friggin' funny. Dude, I can handle a character being a jerk if they are still likeable. The animation in this episode is top-notch too. ****.
Short Order Crooks: For the crooks in the episode, anything that can go wrong WILL go wrong. Fun episode because they were digging themselves into a hole in more ways than one. ***.
Mind Your Cheese and Qs: So they finally had an episode were Monty finally "conquered" his cheese craving. I'll only consider it a success if he NEVER eats cheese again. Oh, waut, he's STILL a huge liability. **1/2.
Out of Scale: Ooooh, revenge is sweet. I had a lot of fun watching Chip and Dale take down that gangster and his insufferable daughter. I also found the henchman who used big words but mangled the English language hilarious. ***1/2.
Dirty Rotten Diapers: Let me get this straight. So this episode traveled seventeen years into the future and ripped off the plot of "Little Man"? Or are the Wayans Brothers just huge Rescue Rangers fans? I'd like to use that time machine to stop that DuckTales episode from ripping off Honey, I Shrunk the Kids two years early. ***1/2.
A Sesame Street Christmas Carol:
Buyer beware. A warning for people who might think that this is Sesame Street's version of a Muppet Christmas Carol. This "movie" is nothing but a glorified clip show showing moments from the infinately superior Sesame Street Christmas specials "Christmas Eve on Sesame Street" and "Elmo Saves Christmas". The special is pretty much just Oscar sitting in his can on Christmas eve while receiving visits from bad CGI ghosts who make him watch clips of the earlier specials. Lame. I am giving the special **1/2 SOLELY because they included the wonderful skit of Bert and Ernie's Gift of the Magi (along with a super-rare appearance by Mister Hooper) which unlike the Elmo Saves Christmas clips wasn't shown out of context at all. The rest of the special stunk. **1/2.
Olive, The Other Reindeer:
Quite simply the best Christmas Special in Years. Matt Greoning made a family friendly , adorable and hilarious cartoon with beautiful animation and WONDERFUL voice-over work. Drew Barrymore delivers a GREAT performance as Olive the dog/ Reindeer. She is just so enthusiatic it's infectious and you can tell she's having a great time. I also really liked that you can TELL Drew is not a professional singer. The fact that her singing is just a WEE bit off key makes it that much more charming.
Speaking of the music it is RIDICULOUSLY catchy. I can't remember another Christmas special/ movie with lyrics and music so great. A Merry Christmas After All indeed.
Martini the Penguin is a great sidekick. And I LOVE how the Postman in the end didn't learn his lesson or get a happy ending. I loved all the puns (especially with the names) and the package for Olive from Deux Ex Machina. I love how everytyhing in the story tied together in the end. Perfect. *****.
Walt Disney's Comics and Stories #674:
Donald Duck in “Snow Job,” by William Van Horn: Funny story. The ending was a LITTLE bit of a cop-out but I still liked the resolution of who the phantom snowballer was. I've never seen Neighbor Jones interacting with the culprit before either. ****.
“Mickey Mouse Joins the Foreign Legion Part One,” by Floyd Gottfredson. : I haven't read this story in years. Excellent first part. I hope Gemstone is planning to reprint more of the classic "Golden Age" Gottfredson stuff. Pie-eyed comic strip Mickey is EASILY my favorite interprestation of the charater and I love how he's always getting out of scrapes. I can't wait for part two! *****.
Gyro Gearloose in "The Orb Saga: Part Five: “War of the Wizards” : The chapter of The Orb Saga was pretty much all backstory (and fantasy mumbo jumbo to boot). I have to admit the end where Gyro forgot everything was REALLY frustrating. And I don't think Vicar really has a good handle on drawing Mickey (or his rather his ancestor). **1/2.
The Phantom Blot in "The Orb Saga: Part Six: Tis the Season To Be Wicked!” by Pat and Carol McGreal: First Chapter of the Orb Saga I've liked. It was really cool to see the Phantom Blot, the Beagle Boys, and Magica cross paths and each fall under the Wizard's sway. I somehow don't think it will REMAIN that easy for the wizard to keep his spell over the Blot (who unlike most Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck villains is a FORMIDABLE adversary). I foresee a Grodd/ Luthoresque showdown coming up between them. ***1/2.
Mickey Mouse in “The Protector of Shambor! Part One" .: I was never that crazy about the Shambor saga as it's pretty much just a warmed over fantasy rip-off (but then so is The Orb Saga) but it was especially frustrating in this story where the entire first part consisted of recaps and Mickey just getting BACK to Shambor at the end. Ugh. **1/2.
Oh, and for the record, The Powerpuff Girls "The Fight Before Christmas" is one of the worst and most disturbing Christmas specials EVER.
I've come to a distressing conclusion after seeing the second volume of Rescue Rangers on DVD.
Chip is a butthole.
And I say butthole merely because it is the kindest word I can call him. I can't think of any Disney Afternoon cartoon character I'd rather spend less time with than Chip. He's uptight, mean, controlling and overbearing. I have a plushie Chip and I love him to death but the Rescue Rangers version is a type A butthole. A real knee-biter.
Dale is da man. Not so much because of anything like clever dialogue (which on this cliched show is noticably absent) but simply because Corey Burton delivers a brilliant, cartoony performance. He SELLS Dale by saying everything with zeal and gusto and conviction. You believe everything Dale says because HE believes it. It's a real shame that this show gave Gadget and Chip an "almost" romance because her innocence and earnestness would have been perfect for Dale.
And Monterey Jack? Has there ever been a more useless member of a crime-fighting team? Seriously, his cheese cravings (aside from being lame) routinely put the group in jeopardy. About halfway through the set I was wishing the rest of the gang would just tie and gag him lock him in his room whenever they left the tree on business. If he had half a brain he would be dangerous. Chip is always complaining about how much trouble Dale causes but if I hired a group of detectives to find my missing puppy, if Monterey Jack was on the case, I wouldn't get a wink of sleep for weeks.
The other thing that really bothers me about the Rescue Rangers is the serious lack of trust between the teammates. At random the writers pick one person in the group to have seen something extraordinary whether it is hurricanes robbing banks, rooms spinning, or zombie inducing mosquitoes and the rest of the team refuses to believe them and tell each other that the person has "cracked" or has gone insane. If I had ever had a "friend" talk to me in such a condescending manner I would kick them square in the nootz. Of course if they WERE believed right away, about a third of the episodes would pretty much have to lose their second acts.
I had fun watching this set. A lot. Because even though I was fourteen when the show premiered I don't think I was truly able to to appreciate the disfunction and animosity between the teammates. It's like all five members are variations on Flash and Green Lantern. SEASON ONE Flash and Green Lantern. ***.
Rescue Rangers To the Rescue: Out of all of the multi-part pilots of the various Disney Afternoon shows To the Rescue is easily the weakest. Very mundane and boring and everything about it is phoned in. We never even saw Drake, Klawdane, and the bulldog ever again so it seemed like a waste of time. Good points? Part one has Fat Cat's catchy musical number "The Best of Everything" set to some beautiful animation. I wish the rest of the five parter had more highlights that much fun. **1/2
A Creep in the Deep: Boring episode. I liked the concept of a fish Naplolean but the episode itself was yawn inducing. **1/2.
Normie's Science Project: Remember when Disney cartoons weren't so utterly humorless that they could actually have villains saying lines like "You can't ever expect to be taken seriously as an evil genius unless you flatten a city"? No. I don't blame you. It's been a Loooooooonnnnng time. ***.
Seer No Evil: This is why I hate Chip. That moth's psychic predictions ALL came true (even the sccchhht! across the neck part) and Chip is STILL a non-believer. I think if Chip was Mulder's partner he'd have hung himself. ***1/2.
Chipwrecked Shipmunks: Second and last appearance of the Pi-Rats. It's a shame. I like how dangerous they are and willing to kill the Rangers at a drop of a hat even if they ARE their friends. The episode was boring though. **1/2.
When Mice Were Men: Boring Monterey Jack spotlight with bullfighting. I'll give the episode credit though: they actually made Monty sympathetic throughout. **1/2.
Chocolate Chips: The Rescue Rangers all DESERVE to be mosquito zombies. AND dipped in chocolate. Poor Dale. **.
The Last Leprecaun: Very unpredictable episode (a RARITY for this show) so I'll give it ***.
Whether Or Not: I have a question. Dale believes in fantastic things. I get that. But as flawed as Monterey Jack is, when has he EVER given the Rangers reason to think he was hallucinating something fantastic? Serious trust issues in the group. Messed up. *1/2.
One-Upsman Chip: On the one hand this episode had Chip blaming himself for getting Dale into trouble. On the other hand, why is it the first fun thing he's EVER done on the series caused him this much grief? Now he'll ALWAYS be a stick in the mud. **1/2.
Shell-Shocked: I want to know exactly what scientific journals Fat Cat has been reading by thinking lining up a group of giant shells will attrach fish. Cause in Disney Cartoonland it actually works. **1/2.
Love is a Many Splintered Thing: Oh, Monty's ex is a piece of WORK. Wow. She is the ex-girlfriend from Hell. However when Chip started instantly sniping at her I immediately took her side. I think if the writer's were hoping to get us to cast doubts on Desiree it was a huge mistake for them to have Chip be the one to question her story. Because he IS, y'know, a butthole. ***.
Song of the Night 'N' Dale: I love this episode. The Emperor is such a lovable character as is his pet parakeet Chirp Sing. And Dale practically has a tour de force this episode. THIS is the sanity questioning scenario done right. Not forced at all. And the animation is beautiful here too. ****1/2.
Double 'O Chipmunk: This episode has a TON of things going for it: Chip getting repeatedly hurt and humiliated, Dale actually getting to have a slew of herioc moments, and Gadget giving Dale a steamy kiss which for Dale/ Gadget shippers gives us a grand total of shipper moments of... one. I love Corey Burton and the enthusiasm he injects Dale with. I was glad he finally got an episode in which HE was the hero. ****.
Gadget Goes Hawaiian: As far as doppelganger episodes go this one isn't too bad, ESPECIALLY since they had the sense to make Gadget's doppelganger the ANTI-GADGET FROM HELL! ***.
It's a Bird, It's Insane, It's Dale!: Okay, Dale WAS kind of a jerk this episode but he was SO friggin' funny. Dude, I can handle a character being a jerk if they are still likeable. The animation in this episode is top-notch too. ****.
Short Order Crooks: For the crooks in the episode, anything that can go wrong WILL go wrong. Fun episode because they were digging themselves into a hole in more ways than one. ***.
Mind Your Cheese and Qs: So they finally had an episode were Monty finally "conquered" his cheese craving. I'll only consider it a success if he NEVER eats cheese again. Oh, waut, he's STILL a huge liability. **1/2.
Out of Scale: Ooooh, revenge is sweet. I had a lot of fun watching Chip and Dale take down that gangster and his insufferable daughter. I also found the henchman who used big words but mangled the English language hilarious. ***1/2.
Dirty Rotten Diapers: Let me get this straight. So this episode traveled seventeen years into the future and ripped off the plot of "Little Man"? Or are the Wayans Brothers just huge Rescue Rangers fans? I'd like to use that time machine to stop that DuckTales episode from ripping off Honey, I Shrunk the Kids two years early. ***1/2.
A Sesame Street Christmas Carol:
Buyer beware. A warning for people who might think that this is Sesame Street's version of a Muppet Christmas Carol. This "movie" is nothing but a glorified clip show showing moments from the infinately superior Sesame Street Christmas specials "Christmas Eve on Sesame Street" and "Elmo Saves Christmas". The special is pretty much just Oscar sitting in his can on Christmas eve while receiving visits from bad CGI ghosts who make him watch clips of the earlier specials. Lame. I am giving the special **1/2 SOLELY because they included the wonderful skit of Bert and Ernie's Gift of the Magi (along with a super-rare appearance by Mister Hooper) which unlike the Elmo Saves Christmas clips wasn't shown out of context at all. The rest of the special stunk. **1/2.
Olive, The Other Reindeer:
Quite simply the best Christmas Special in Years. Matt Greoning made a family friendly , adorable and hilarious cartoon with beautiful animation and WONDERFUL voice-over work. Drew Barrymore delivers a GREAT performance as Olive the dog/ Reindeer. She is just so enthusiatic it's infectious and you can tell she's having a great time. I also really liked that you can TELL Drew is not a professional singer. The fact that her singing is just a WEE bit off key makes it that much more charming.
Speaking of the music it is RIDICULOUSLY catchy. I can't remember another Christmas special/ movie with lyrics and music so great. A Merry Christmas After All indeed.
Martini the Penguin is a great sidekick. And I LOVE how the Postman in the end didn't learn his lesson or get a happy ending. I loved all the puns (especially with the names) and the package for Olive from Deux Ex Machina. I love how everytyhing in the story tied together in the end. Perfect. *****.
Walt Disney's Comics and Stories #674:
Donald Duck in “Snow Job,” by William Van Horn: Funny story. The ending was a LITTLE bit of a cop-out but I still liked the resolution of who the phantom snowballer was. I've never seen Neighbor Jones interacting with the culprit before either. ****.
“Mickey Mouse Joins the Foreign Legion Part One,” by Floyd Gottfredson. : I haven't read this story in years. Excellent first part. I hope Gemstone is planning to reprint more of the classic "Golden Age" Gottfredson stuff. Pie-eyed comic strip Mickey is EASILY my favorite interprestation of the charater and I love how he's always getting out of scrapes. I can't wait for part two! *****.
Gyro Gearloose in "The Orb Saga: Part Five: “War of the Wizards” : The chapter of The Orb Saga was pretty much all backstory (and fantasy mumbo jumbo to boot). I have to admit the end where Gyro forgot everything was REALLY frustrating. And I don't think Vicar really has a good handle on drawing Mickey (or his rather his ancestor). **1/2.
The Phantom Blot in "The Orb Saga: Part Six: Tis the Season To Be Wicked!” by Pat and Carol McGreal: First Chapter of the Orb Saga I've liked. It was really cool to see the Phantom Blot, the Beagle Boys, and Magica cross paths and each fall under the Wizard's sway. I somehow don't think it will REMAIN that easy for the wizard to keep his spell over the Blot (who unlike most Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck villains is a FORMIDABLE adversary). I foresee a Grodd/ Luthoresque showdown coming up between them. ***1/2.
Mickey Mouse in “The Protector of Shambor! Part One" .: I was never that crazy about the Shambor saga as it's pretty much just a warmed over fantasy rip-off (but then so is The Orb Saga) but it was especially frustrating in this story where the entire first part consisted of recaps and Mickey just getting BACK to Shambor at the end. Ugh. **1/2.
Oh, and for the record, The Powerpuff Girls "The Fight Before Christmas" is one of the worst and most disturbing Christmas specials EVER.
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no subject
Date: 2006-12-23 03:25 am (UTC)I think it's funny you're so down on Chip and Monty, as I loved those characters as a kid, but I bet if I watched these episodes again, I would've thought the same thing. I have to admit, my partiality to Chip came from always playing him in the Rescue Rangers game, and my friend was Dale, so I was a Chip/Gadget shipper simply because Chip's victory was my victory. Dale always made me laugh (Lemon Pie-o), but I thought he was an idiot, and I never blamed Chip for being a dick because Dale was so stupid and distracting. I could be wrong, though. I liked Monterey Jack's adventurous attitude, and his cheese thing was funny, but you're right, they are pretty stupid not to take necessary precautions against that sort of thing.
Needless to say, if I ever get around to re-watching this series, I'll have quite the reaction to it.
Remember when Disney cartoons weren't so utterly humorless that they could actually have villains saying lines like "You can't ever expect to be taken seriously as an evil genius unless you flatten a city"? No. I don't blame you. It's been a Loooooooonnnnng time.
It hasn't been that long. That kind of villain is few and far between, but I'd say Dr. Drakken from Kim Possible is molded in the same spirit.
Oh, and Gadget's doppleganger is hot.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-23 01:52 pm (UTC)I think Gadget was actually hotter than her doppelganger in Double O Chipmunk and Mind Your Cheese and Qs. She can REALLY pull off smokin' outfits. :D
Have you ever seen Olive, The Other Reindeer?
no subject
Date: 2006-12-28 03:50 am (UTC)Haven't seen Olive. I want to, but every time it's on, I just say I'll catch it when they rerun it again, so I never watch it.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-28 09:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-24 04:05 am (UTC)I like the Postman too. It's nice to have a truly hissable baddie in a Christmas special. I love that he didn't learn his lesson.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-24 04:07 pm (UTC)My feelings of Martha Stewart are ambivilant. Yes, she's a b****, but there are MUCH worse people out there who do far more harm. I don't care about her one way or the other.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-24 05:57 pm (UTC)But yeah, reality shows are much worse. I just think a game show which takes absolutely no skill to play isn't the best idea in the world.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-25 09:47 am (UTC)