"Breaking Bad" Season Five Reviews (Spoilers)

[matt_zimmer]

Breaking Bad "Live Free Or Die"

Magnets, bitches!

Oh, that hug at the end was creepy as hell.

Saul realizes he just traded one sociopath for another. He's done when Walt says he's done.

Mike's reactions to the insane plan were amusing.

Ted is afraid of Skyler! After getting over her initial shock at this, she's smart enough to feed into it and use it.

Heisenberg facade discussion coming up. Soon. Wait for it. ****.

Breaking Bad "Madrigal"

Walt was SO creeping me out with Skyler at the end. His "comforting" massage to Jesse was also cringe.

Walt is telling her it will pass. He doesn't understand she doesn't WANT it to. It's the one thing keeping her human. It's weird Walt doesn't miss that.

Mike was impressing me throughout the episode. Mostly by his ultimate reluctance to kill Lydia because of her pleas for her daughter. Pop-Pop relates to that. I especially love him in the diner telling her he doesn't know what movies she's seen, but you don't go around murdering 11 people as some sort of prophylactic. And it's fucked up that so many movies have ingrained that ridiculous idea in society. I like Mike pointing out it's actually ridiculous and not the way the world works. Somebody ought to tell Walt this shit. Because he supposedly goes through with this later on like the dumbass he is.

Just for the record, Hank's interview with Mike shows once again that Hank is a pure asshole. He may be good at zeroing in on suspects but he's a shitty human being. Full stop.

I liked the captain saying Gus operated right under his nose. I wonder if Hank was making any connections to Walt in that moment. He seemed to consider the words more seriously than somebody who WASN'T making that connection as they were spoken.

Before accepting the offer at the end, Mike rejects it because he calls Walt "a time bomb". He made the right decision the first time. Walt clearly is and is going to take down a ton of people when he finally blows up. I'm not sure WHY Mike changed his mind (maybe as his sole excuse to let Lydia live?). But nothing about that astute earlier observation has actually changed. ***1/2.

Breaking Bad "Hazard Pay"

For the record, Walt probably guessed right about the real reason Gus killed Victor. Good for the show for having Victor do all that stuff ahead of time. It feeds perfectly into this. The show is great at setting up things like that seasons before it comes up again.

Jesse is right that Walt is thinking of the money situation wrong though. Walt has delusions of adequacy.

Skyler doesn't argue with Walt anymore. That is significant. She has been cowed, which might make some fans happy, but it pisses me off. Her horror at Walt enjoying Scarface with Junior (and the baby!) is real. Even if he weren't a drug dealer, that's an inappropriate to cheer along to with your kid. But because he is, it feels like fucking grooming as well. It's appalling.

For the record, about Skyler's breakdown? I've always wanted to yell at Marie to repeatedly shut up too. It's arguably the most rational thing she does in the episode.

Walt using Ted's affair as the excuse is both cunning and disgustingly manipulative. He sucks.

For the record, Walter's plan about the moving tented drug lab has strengths and weaknesses. The biggest virtue being if it always works correctly, it would be nearly impossible to get caught. The drawback is I can't picture it ALWAYS working correctly. Not on this show. It SEEMS like less of a risk, but Walt and Jesse are a couple of clowns. It's really not.

Talking about the Heisenberg facade in the finale "Gliding Over All". Getting my thoughts together for it. ****.

Breaking Bad "Fifty-One"

For anyone reading my reviews who hates the character of Skyler because she's a nagging bitch and unsympathetic to Walt's problems, you can kindly fuck off now. If after THAT episode, you hate her for THAT, there's something wrong with YOU. Not her.

I don't know what else to say about this VERY powerful episode other than Walt is a monster. He mentions Jesse changed his mind about him. The irony? Jesse was wrong to do that. It was a mistake. Walt poisoned Brock after all. Seriously fucked up move to declare Jesse Pinkman one of his interpersonal relationship successes.

This show, man. It scares the shit out of me. *****.

Breaking Bad "Dead Freight"

This was a delightful, fun heist episode with lots of twists and turns, and legit stakes and tension, and then they give us THAT ending. I mean, I'm not saying the show needs to always be sweetness and light, but it's okay to read the room and vary the tone.

I enjoyed that episode very much until the end. And I resent TV that refuses to let me enjoy it. ****.

Breaking Bad "Buyout"

Skyler described herself as not a wife, but a hostage in the last episode, and when Walt invites Jesse to dinner, DARING her to object, she's right. She fits the definition at this point.

Maybe Jesse wouldn't have bailed if they went with Option 2 for Todd. Honestly, that one sounded the most appealing to me.

Saul continues to amuse me.

The fall-out from the last episode was NOT pretty. But the episode itself was solid. ****.

Breaking Bad "Say My Name"

We'll be talking about the Heisenberg facade in the next review (finally!) but as charismatic as Walt's pitch is at the beginning, it's bullshit spewed by a bullshitter dumb enough to believe his own hype.

And every damn thing Mike told him at the end of the episode was the Goddamned truth.

Walt seems outraged and surprised Jesse was willing to leave, even with that payday hanging unfulfilled over his head. He doesn't understand that Jesse still has his soul. He doesn't recognize that because he doesn't possess one himself.

Skyler: Hostage. Yes. That's all her role has turned into as this point. It's a little depressing.

Mike was the one heavy on the show who pretty much did everything right. And Walter screwed him over for the sin of telling him the truth that he sucked. Mike called Walt a timebomb earlier in the season and my biggest regret with him is he wasn't able to escape the blast himself. It's a damn shame. ***1/2.

Breaking Bad "Gliding Over All"

Heisenberg is the biggest pile of horseshit ever.

All Breaking Bad fans, obsessed with Walter White as Heisenberg swag, it's not real. It never was.

This is MY opinion. I fundamentally disagree with other fans' conclusions there. The show has value because either you OR I might be wrong. So far they haven't said for sure.

My opinion, (and this is something that will not change) is that something like coolness and badassery is not a learned skilled. I do not remotely believe Walter White evolved from Mr. Chips to Scarface. I don't believe that's how people work. You either ARE a badass or you aren't. And Heisenberg certainly didn't unearth hidden depths of coolness and cunning that he simply never tapped into before.

It's all a scam. All of it.

Walter White carries himself like he's a hung porn star but he's actually the pasty guy stranded in the desert in his underwear. His life experiences are unable to change that fact. I think part of the moral debate of the show is "Was Walter always a bad person or did he grow into one for misguided reasons?"

It's the wrong question and it always was. Walter was ALWAYS a selfish terrible narcissist. Whether or not he fed into that bile before he became a criminal, or kept his rage inside, doesn't change the fact that he's always been a creep and a turd. He might not have always been Scarface. But he SURE as hell was NEVER Mr. Chips.

The right question isn't about Walter's faults. It's asking about whether or not his experiences were the things to gain him confidence and charisma and COOLNESS. I don't question Heisenberg affecting his bad points. I think they have always been static. But did Heisenberg ACTUALY turn White Walter into a hardcase badass?

My opinion is it did not. My opinion is Heisenberg is an act phonier than a three-dollar bill. I recognize this level of cowardly macho posturing from the current political climate. And of course, plenty of people are able to fall for the worst con ever. That doesn't make it real or not a con. Walter is a fraud, and yet he's such a CONVINCING fraud he's cowed his wife, a person who is actually much stronger than he is.

And I don't care if "He's out," in the final mid-season finale and back to pretending to be a loving family man. He is a full of shit sociopath either way. And he always was.

If you ask me Hank caught on too late. The damage has been done. And let's be clear. Walter will inevitably be responsible for a LOT more pain and suffering in the final 8 episodes (I'm guessing much of it suffered by Hank). But Walter White has not only never been a good person. But he's always been a pathetic loser. And something like that, you either are or you are not. And I think we learned little about Walter White over these past four seasons that the Pilot didn't already tell us. Everything else is bullshit. Heisenberg is the doughy guy losing his pants in the middle of the desert in a broken down RV. He is NOT The Man Who Knocks. He never was. And he never will be. I think ultimately Skyler is terrified of nothing. I don't blame her, but I have more context for that opinion than she does. Walter White is full of shit and always was. ****.