matt_zimmer | Goodbye Harry Potter: "Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban" Review (Spoilers)

Goodbye Harry Potter: Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban

This is the first project in my Goodbye Harry Potter reviews to get a positive grade and review. And yet... And yet... There is still plenty I am unhappy with.

After this book came out fans insisted Rowling ought to go into writing mysteries. She definitely has a knack for the construction of them. One of the major selling points of THIS specific mystery is that all of the elements are outlandish and bonkers, so it's impossible for the reader to solve. But just because it's impossible for the reader to solve, doesn't mean it isn't fair. All of the elements needed to solve it have been sprinkled all throughout not just this book, but the previous two. Which makes it an impressive trick of writing, and a good and satisfying mystery solve. This is Rowling starting to get more comfortable writing a cohesive narrative.

And the climax is fucking dark. Hermione sobbing because she believes Harry is about to kill her cat is so raw and real for the awful reason that he IS. As outlandish as the Pettigrew scenario is, it's personal and horrible.

Speaking of it being personal, dragging Snape into the climax was brilliant. He played his role as antagonist perfectly. There is also a major clue he is good at the end that Harry either misses or is too petty to appreciate. Although Snape is telling Cornelius Fudge that Potter and his friends' rulebreaking almost led to tragedy, and there needs to be punishment, Snape is also very careful to say that Black supposedly confunded the Trio. If Snape was truly not invested in protecting Harry, and against both him and Dumbledore's agenda, he could have insisted Harry and his friends were deliberately complicit. And considering both Black and Pettigrew got away, and their only witness is a Werewolf, that could have been enough to convince Fudge. But Snape only wants Harry punished, not destroyed, and know accusations of complicity could get him expelled and endanger both his life and the debt he felt he owed Lily. I always found Snape's insistence on the Confunding Charm being used here a clear indication he has always been on the side of angels, and one of the reasons I dislike Harry sometimes is that obvious shit like that brushes by him completely. The fact that he took no notice of it, and it in fact is never mentioned again or treated as important show Harry's blindspots. Or possibly Rowling's herself.

There are a lot of blind spots for Rowling in this book. Rowling has matured enough as writer to put together an actual plot. What she has still not managed to do it populate it with believable characters.

I've mentioned before that there is too much meanness and bullying in the books. And there is. But I might not be as put off by that as I am if it were remotely realistic. Malfoy being such a wimp about his injury is something real children would fucking make fun of. Openly. To his face. Likewise the fact that Malfoy is also bringing up his father is something real world kids would latch onto and give him hell for. Making kissy noises and calling him a baby and a Daddy's boy. Goddammit, Dan Quayle got shit for that and he was never the sniveling namedropper Malfoy is. You think a teenage boy would get away with that?

The closest Malfoy has been to being called on that was Hermione mentioning that Malfoy bought his way onto the Quidditch team via his father with new brooms in the last book. But he calls her a Mudblood for it, and instead of Harry and pals realizing they struck a nerve (and insult gold) they never bring it up again.

I get the appeal of Severus Snape. I do. There is a glamour to the character and his darkness is very much of the Bad Boy variety. But Malfoy is a whiny baby. I understand in real life a certain public figure is too, and STILL has a lot of fans. But he's still repeatedly called on that by the opposition. The fact that is never occurs to Harry and friends to point out Malfoy's reliance on his family name comes from a sense of weakness instead of strength drives me crazy, because every little real-world asshole kid knows enough to do that when a kid starting throwing around "Wait till I tell my Mommy and Daddy!" How the fuck has Rowling made it a non-issue instead?

Another good complaint is this book further works against the moral of choices. Yeah, Harry saving Pettigrew's life is a choice (and a good one) but Rowling was unable to think of a good use for it in the seventh book, despite the promise of that here, so no credit. Genuine Prophecy by Trelawney also works against that, although ironically Hermione standing against her nonsense before it's revealed she IS a true Seer of sorts actually helps the notion. Weird Rowling immediately blows it up by the end of the book. And as interesting as the schoolboy drama being Black, Lupin, and Snape is (and it's SUPER interesting) the fact that essentially the entire return of Voldemort is down to how old schoolyard grudges play out is ALSO the antithesis of choice, particularly if Harry is goaded into taking the side he is by adults fighting a battle with a dude over shit that happened over 20 years ago. Generational feuds and inherited grudges are the antithesis of choice.

One last complaint. The recap of the previous books in the opening chapter is awkward as hell. To be fair, Rowling stopped doing the recaps in the fifth book, but in this book and the previous one especially they feel cringe. Mostly because it's unreasonable that Rowling is acting like people might be picking this book up fresh and not have read the previous ones. But you know what? If that is true, they aren't the readers that should ever be catered to. To those of us who read the first two books, reading this awkward, poorly written exposition hurts the book.

Before I close the review with a positive grade, I do have to reiterate my disapproval of Rowling's use of Looksism and fat-shaming. She is NOT a very kind person or writer, and yeah, it's as bad as ever, and in a lot of ways, even worse. It's a major problem.

But even if this is the final time I read this book, I still think it was a pretty good read. ****.

Goodbye Harry Potter: "Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban" Review (Spoilers)

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